Cali Kittana

Cold Showers

I used to like cold showers

After a long day at work

Or a hot day in the sun

But lately it feels too cold

I feel almost empty

So I turn the water up

And even higher still

Until I feel the steam and the sting

The water feels almost burning

Yet it doesn't feel like enough

I turn it all the way over

Then I sit on the floor and wait

While the water burns

My skin red

The steam clearing my nose

I sit there

Awaiting some sweet relief

Yet all I feel is the emptiness

I try to cry but nothing comes out

There's nothing I can do anymore

I miss the feeling of the cold

Wishing I could go back in time

Back when the cold was relaxing

When I was called the ice princess

When everyone would wonder how I did it

Barefoot in the snow

But I haven't been her in a long time

The hot water only hurts me more

I turn the handle

More and more to the opposite side

I feel the cold pierce my skin

It almost feels painful

Yet not as painful as my mind

I let the cold water flow

My body starts to feel numb

The handle turns more

Suddenly there is no more water

I stand there alone

Naked

Disappointed

My mind continues to wonder

Yet there's no time to ponder

I grab my towel and leave the room

My expression blank

My mind full

I used to like cold showers

Comments5

  • L. B. Mek

    'My expression blank, My mind full'
    wonderful depth of self-awareness and insight
    hope you find the 'warm' paths of life soon

  • Michael Edwards

    i can read a lot into this - great write Cali

  • ForeverJesus6

    There is something about this piece. I am not sure, but I like it. I am happy that you found the desire to write again.
    Jesus heals.
    Persistence is key

  • Unsub

    Good to see you back & writing with such vigour!

    Enjoyed but not sure now whether to have a hot or cold shower? Like you I’ll have both. See what works.

    Enjoyed,

    Unsub.

  • dusk arising

    The two extremes both needing water. Lovely choice of metaphor. Stay out of the water and you won't get ........



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