dusk arising

The tale of Louise rabbit and Roland the hedgehog

 



Louise was everso fussy about leaves,
for she liked them so fresh and quite juicy.
All the better to keep her nimble and slim
not too heavy like big sister Lucy.

She'd found new patch of fresh dandies
past the daffs and out under the hedge.
Down a concrete path that hurt her feet
thru a gate propped shut with a wedge.

Munch and crunch she'd chew all day
unaware of what else was around
when all of a sudden her ears went up
for she had heard a very strange sound.

Scramble and scrunch and snuffly sniff
sure enough somethings coming her way,
and - oh cor crikey - it came into view saying
"I am Roland the Hedgehog, good day!"

Oh my, oh my, what a very strange chap  
not at all the sort of fellow she likes.
For, although he seemed very respectable,
he was covered all over in spikes!     

"Good morning dear mr hedgehog"
said  louise whilst sniffing a rose
she'd noticed Rolands cutest of eyes
and his wiggle-de-piggle-de nose.

"I don't suppose you have seen"  he began
"a tortoise with a big yellow brolly
of dearie oh me, seems ive lost him you see,
we were chased that  big next doors' collie".

Now Louise had been chased by that collie
but she could run just as fast as could be.
Just as well cos collie chased all that he saw
from his kennel below the oak tree.

With her wibbley nose, her bobbley tail
and ears so fine and so long,
Louise had captured poor Rolands heart
and he began to sing her this song.
               
             " Oh Louise sweet bunny from under the hedge
               with your whiskers so fine and so smart
               would  you dance with this spikey young hedgehog
               for i'm afraid you've stolen my heart "

They danced on the lawn by the patio
to the coo of a blue turtle dove
and louise the rabbit was swept off her feet
having fallen so deeply in love.

The snails and the doormice applauded.
Four squirrels all danced in a ring.
The tortoishell cat threw up his top hat
and they all  began to sing.

          " hoo-rah, hoo-rah, for spike and miss bunny
            for they dance together so well.
            We do declare there is love in the air
            and to where it shall lead who can tell "

The gerbil and the chihuahua
had prepared an impromptu meal,
there was lobster and flounder
             and a beef quarter pounder
and of course a large jellied eel.

The drinks were provided by Muriel
and a cocker-poo spaniel called Tosh.
There was bubbly coke to tickle the throat
and plenty of cold orange squash.
                                                                 
As the shadows began to grow longer      
the owl played a flute in the tree
and standing before sweet lulu his love
Roland hedgehog went down on one knee.

"I know that im not a rich hedgehog
and I dont have many comforts in life,
i'm asking you meekly, for I love you so deeply
Louise would you please be my wife"

The smile that then greeted young Roland
gave each of his spikes such a thrill.
There was no diguise, the love in her eyes
she said "yes my dear Roland I will"  

Comments8

  • orchidee

    A lovely write dusk.

  • L. B. Mek

    Roland works fast! lol
    wonderfully rhythmic and enjoyed the small characterisation details, quirky and fun
    '"Good morning dear mr hedgehog"
    said louise whilst sniffing a rose
    she'd noticed Rolands cutest of eyes
    and his wiggle-de-piggle-de nose.'

    • dusk arising

      Well things have to happen fast to keep kiddies interest or theyre gazing at the TV again. Was lots of fun writing this whilst I was in the right frame of mind. I'm pleased you liked it, thank you for commenting.

    • Neville


      This is a most endearing tale DA and you really should try and get the whole thing published as a children's book ... I dont have any grandchildren as yet, but I do know that if I did, they would absolutely love this ....

      Neville

      • dusk arising

        Publishers are bombarded with keen writers work i think. My grand daughter was mildly amused when i read to her last week. Thanks for your encouraging comment sir.

      • Laura

        dusk arising,

        A captivating tale that will enchant any child...or adult (in my case😉). Neville has a great suggestion about having it published.

        I enjoyed the read.
        Thank you for sharing.

        Laura🌻

        • dusk arising

          Such fun to write this sort of thing. I think publishers are bombarded with kiddies book wannabe authors output. Kiddies are more interested in TV characters but i do think bedtime stories to be read at the bedside do have a particular niche.

          Thank you for commenting and i'm pleased you enjoyed reading.

        • The Uneducated O.A.P

          This O.A.P thoroughly enjoyed your tale and looking forward to episode 2.
          What will the offspring be? Rabhogs? Hedgebits? Lol

        • 5 more comments

        • Michael Edwards

          Well I'm 77 but I'm still a grandchild and I just love it - what an enchanting write - wish it was mine. More please Dusk.

          • dusk arising

            It was such fun to find myself in the frame of mind to write this, hopefully I will be there again before too long and we'll find out what happens next. Pleased you enjoyed this.

          • Fay Slimm.

            Loud applause for this sweet love story - I have to confess it had me enthralled. Delighted to find a happy ending in this rhyme-for-all-ages dear friend.

            • dusk arising

              There must be more to come. I'll find it one day i hope. Was lots of fun writing it and reading it to granddaughter the other day.

            • Poetic Dan

              I shall need more time to practice your rhymes but when I get it right it will be a very nice flow... Blowing in the wind, maybe with the willow ;)

              • dusk arising

                The owl and the pussy cat got washed up on a beach
                where they met two dogs towing Dan
                pussy was wary but the dogs weren\'t so scarey
                and the owl had worked out a plan.

                He realised just maybe, that Dan had a baby
                which meant his home was quite near
                and could be in the mood, to give them some food
                and maybe a can of cold beer

                But Dan is no fool, and playing it cool
                deftly unpacked his camcorder
                with a voice like a claxon shouted out \'action\'
                which seemed to keep them in order

                Dan\'s direction controlled all the action
                and slowly developed the plot
                but when baby starts crying, there is no denying
                and everyone rushed to her cot

                • Poetic Dan

                  Absolutely brilliant... At 6.30am my friend



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