Custer.

Goldfinch60



A man of such vast riches,

We could never count his wealth.

Was going away on holiday,

To indulge his selfless self.

 

Before he went on travelling,

He asked an artist proud,

To paint a vast, large mural,

That would attract a stunning crowd.

 

He wanted a special type of work,

To depict the words of Custer,

As at the Little Big Horn fight

He and his troops did muster.

 

The man went on his sojourn,

To places far and wide.

Spending great sums of money,

With all those at his side.

 

Some weeks later he came home,

Fit and bronzed and tanned.

Still with loads of money,

Always close to hand.

 

He came into the room,

To see the artist’s work.

And stood in shock and anger,

And called the man a burke.

 

A fish was standing upright,

With a halo up above.

And at its side were Indians,

Making wild and furious love.

 

As he turned with red-face anger

Towards the cowered man;

He said “Just what is this?

This was not the plan!

 

The man said, “It is what you asked for,

To show what Custer said.

And that’s what I’ve depicted,

Just get it in your head!”

 

“With all those braves approaching,

Some several hundred millions,

He turned and shouted loudly

Holy Mackerel, Fucking Indians!”

  • Author: Goldfinch60 (Pseudonym) (Offline Offline)
  • Published: April 19th, 2021 01:18
  • Comment from author about the poem: Just a bit of as laugh for a Monday morning. One of my ancestors was General Alfred Terry who was Custer's commanding officer and he had ordered Custer not to go to the Little Big Horn, as Custer was killed Custer's second in command was subsequently court marshalled for Custer's failure to follow orders.
  • Category: Humor
  • Views: 22
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Comments +

Comments5

  • orchidee

    Oh lol, good write Gold. Were we there too, us two?!

    • Goldfinch60

      No I wasn't at that one, my ancestor told me not to go.

    • Doggerel Dave

      Gold star comedy...... shaggy (yes?) dog story,....rhyme. What more could one (or two, or more) ask for?

      • Goldfinch60

        Thanks Dave, just a bit of a laugh.

        Andy

      • L. B. Mek

        sorry Andy - but I can't find this funny (nor sadly, can I simply scroll-past and ignore)..
        general Custer was a war criminal
        who butchered helpless woman and children
        going - against
        what were originally - inhumane orders
        to act-out
        his zealotry of blinkered cruelty!

        • Goldfinch60

          I can understand your feelings Mek and I apologise for putting it up, after I had put it on the site I did think about taking it off again.
          The Native Americans had an horrendous time at the hands of the supposed controlling forces at the time.
          I have a great deal of respect for the Native Americans in the way that they treated nature and the natural world as their 'god'.

          Andy

          • Doggerel Dave

            Excuse me, Andy if my memory fails me, but did not Custer receive his comeuppance (fatally) at Little Bighorn anyway - good result, I'd say - time for a little laugh, as in 🙂

          • dusk arising

            Blimey i remember my brother telling me that story when i was about 14. Thanks for retelling a good fun story here. It brought back a few memories of happier times with my now departed brother Rod.

            Life is for the living.

            Footnote. I recently bought a native american flute to mess about with. It's a very limited instrument and has a lovely haunting tone but only one octave. One day i shall organise my music room (too many other projects on the go at the moment - including being lazy) and make a recording or two to accompany my scribblings on MPS.

            • Goldfinch60

              Yes it is a very old story d a.

              Strangely I was listening to Native American music yesterday an album called "Native Visions: A Native American Music Journey" and that was lead by a native american flute, quite enjoyed it.

              Andy

              • Doggerel Dave

                Let it be an old story, Andy. There's a proposition out there that there's only seven original jokes in Jokeland's oeuvre.
                I will do my own favourite oldie - trouble is I couldn't rhyme it - so you'll have to suffer my prose...

              • Andy Hunter

                Brilliant, funny and great metering.I am now going to read all your posted poems.

                • Goldfinch60

                  I am truly honoured, I hope you have a great deal of time as there are 1516 poem of mine on this site.

                  • Andy Hunter

                    Okay, maybe not all of them.
                    Wish I had your talent with words though, because what I have read so-far is superb.
                    Keep writing.

                    • Goldfinch60

                      Thank you for your kind words Andy.

                      Andy



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