beginning

but nobody cares when i'm not around 

so i'm left to myself and let myself drown 

in all those feelings that'll soon fade away 

and all that's left is my numb shade

 

and still, then there'll be nobody around 

just like always, they might think i'm fine 

but the truth is i'm on the brink of dying 

soon there'll be no one left for me to keep on trying 

 

oh, i've waited so much time and still not a change 

i keep lying to myself "it'll take few more days"

yet i know deep inside that i'm on my own 

and i crave this odd feeling, the feeling of home 

 

now i see it's too much and not meant for all 

us who will have to carry on on their own 

and you'd say we got used to it through all those years 

yet i, still have hope - is it why my heart breaks?

 

everything makes me know that's all my own fault 

my hands turned to blood when i was alone 

and my brain still feels like it's about to explode 

when i am staring at the ceiling 

oh how much i hate my thoughts, how much i hate this feeling

 

the voice inside my drawer called me every night

i had to resist, yet it was so hard 

it never brought joy neither relief 

but i felt like i deserved it 

the tears by my feet