Dommer was a vegan

It’s been a long time

That it’s been a crime

To eat another man

But its been just fine

On animals to dine

Any time you can

Eat a corpse you’re a ghoul

Something alive now that’s really cruel

Most of what you eat is dead

Causing pain’s not cool

It’s against the rule

Better to eat a loaf of bread

For it’s not right to eat

A poor creature’s meat

even if it’s eggs yogurt or cheese

Chew instead on a beet

Nothing with feelings or feet

only fruit, pasta or peas

Some say it’s only right

On plants to bite

But is this really true

They’re in a terrible plight

No way to fight

But they’re living creatures just like me or you

Now microbes are small

They shouldn’t count at all

But you’re full of these animals don’t you know

Inside your intestinal wall

Ever so small

They keep you well and help you to grow

Just because they can’t talk

Paint, do math or walk

We call their species inferior

Their inability's we mock

Of their genius we take no stock

We ingest them then eject them out our posterior

It’s nature’s way

It happens every day

Every living thing is equal

Don’t let anyone say

What you can’t eat or what you may

To every life there’s a sequel

But don’t think yourself a saint

Because that you aint

But then don’t think of yourself as a sinner

So don’t be faint

Your soul you won’t taint

If you have uncle Charlie for dinner

As Dommer would say

A vegan I’ll stay

I promise to eat my vegetable greens

In spelling I won’t get an A

But I’ll maintain a strict diet in every way

by eating incapacitated human beans^(sic)