Hello there
Mackenzie.
I’ve been watching your
progress
In life.
Those panic attacks of yours
are nothing to
worry about.
You act as if you are alone in the
world. But you are not.
You have family and friends—
why do you push them
away?
They love you very much.
I have seen this love
I wish I was that loved
when I was alive.
Do not give up on yourself
Mackenzie.
I know you are capable of
so much more.
I have seen it.
-
Author:
M.E.M. (
Offline) - Published: July 4th, 2023 13:06
- Comment from author about the poem: Created: 6/13/23 | Prompt: write a poem as a ghost who picked up a pen and wrote to you. I es trying to make it creepy and loving. Did I achieve that? Comments are welcome!
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 4
Offline)
Comments2
First off, outstanding job on your poem! To be honest, I didn't see it as creepy, but maybe that's because of how loving and reflective the ghost was towards Mackenzie. I enjoyed the prompt itself and how effectively you conveyed it through your work, as it kind of hit home for me. The way the ghost went into the very specific details, especially of love and the stated relationships, added a layer of meaning since it's trying to help Mackenzie discover what she herself already knew. This, thus, was similar to therapy for her, I feel like. One last thought that I have is that the prompt you worked with stated "a" ghost, but what about a poem in which it was "your" future ghost writing to the present you? I think that'd produce an engaging (or at least very thought-provoking) work! Still, great job on your poem, and I loved it!
Thank you so much for the feedback!! I absolutely LOVE your take on how the prompt could be changed. That would make it THAT much more impactful.
Clever write MEM.
Andy
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