Dave was bragging to a mate one day
That he knew all and everyone – fair play:
While skepticism ruled in his mate,
He found himself keen to take the bait.
So was hauled off for several meetings
With famous persons, received warm greetings:
Tom Cruise, Pres Trump, UK PM all came good,
And greeted Dave the way old friends should.
(But his mate still was skeptical):
“Ok then, but what about, say, the Pope?”
However Dave won’t be taken for a dope
(Takes him to Italy for something exceptional).
St Peter’s Square; the crowd awaits the Pope,
But Dave believes with that many there’s little hope
So sorts it with the guards and disappears….
Up on the balcony appear two figures;
And this is when the whole thing is the test
As to whether Dave really knows the rest……
‘Cos the bloke next to Dave’s mate is asking
Who’s that next to Dave doing the praying?
-
Author:
Doggerel Dave (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: February 5th, 2026 15:59
- Comment from author about the poem: This is the first part of an effort (no promises!) to ‘lighten up’ on my part. So here I bring you in short form rhymer mode a very old, long shaggy dog story for your delectation and delight. Note re terminology: (a) the Dave in the yarn isn’t me - there are other Dave’s in the world you know; and (b) ‘Dave’ persists as the name of the main protagonist in this old yarn; check it out - my title gets you there.
- Category: Unclassified
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Comments5
Dave you made me smile with this one. It seems that I have known a couple of people like this. I had an uncle like that he took us as a child several places where he moved people out of their seats so we could sit in the best place, directed traffic in traffic jams to get us through, stopped planes from taking off so he could get on and say goodbye to people, parked in law enforcement only places moving the barricades and putting them back behind him and not getting toed or even a ticket.
All I know is that the 'Dave' story is a total fable, of course. Your input adds a different dimension, Soren. Thanks.
Dave, this is playful storytelling with a knowing wink. The rhyme keeps it buoyant, the cameos escalate the absurdity, and the shaggy dog payoff lands perfectly. If this is you lightening up, I’d say it suits you well. Thoroughly enjoyed, my friend. 🌹🖤🙏🕯️🐦⬛
I don't know how you maintain the positivity, Tristan, but as usual I maintain the gratitude. Many thanks.
Oh...I have my moments! LOL! But I appreciate the gratitude all the same, my friend. 😊
Good fun write Dave, or is it Dave, looking forward to the next ones.
Andy
Hey Andy - just the man I wanted to confer with. I want to lighten up a little. Now I know you have a stock of funnies in your archive - could you haul one or two out? (I still remember the Sherlock Holmes goes camping with some affection).
Hi Dave, yes I can haul out some funnies for you.
Andy
'Way to go, Andy.
Dave's on a mission around the world, and its only right famous people would want to be photographed with him.
In saying that. The Pope lad, he's a bit miffed you took his gold toilet. I told him it was an overshite, oops, meant oversight.
Now assuming you've not melted it down, could you maybe haul it back, the cistern chapel without a bog is just a chapel.
Nobel thing coming your way.
Nah - use it daily. Much more regular than I say me prayers..... Seat's a bit cold...OK in summer. I would return it honest, but that gold stuff is bloody heavy and it took it out of me hauling it here. Well if I get the Nobel, maybe I could dynamite it back....
PS: Been to that Chapel joint. It's a hell hole. Bleedin' other tourists....
Just email him, I don't like tourists, pop in and see me.
Where are you located....?
The Vatican.
Cardinal Paul Bell, The Vatican should get yer? Wot about the postcode?
Got to be, VC1.
You're downright hilarious.
Oh you do go on - (I like it...)😜
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