Yes, I'm the guy who
Took so long to find out what Carpe Diem meant
That by the time I found out
It was night-time and no day left to seize - Doh!
And I'm the guy who
Obeyed that notice:
'This Fire Door must be kept closed at all times'
When there was a fire
I had to jump out the window
Well, to open the door was forbidden - Doh!
I'm the guy who
Always goes to the 99p shop
Cos the £1 shop is far too expensive
(1 penny more expensive each item
Noted for you non-UK poets) - Doh!
And I'm the guy who
Is still looking for Bill Posters or Bill Stickers
(Not that million year old joke again! lol)
Cos they are gonna be prosecuted
Why? What have they done? - Doh!
And I'm the guy
Who married KP
She hid the water from my whisky
Made me tipsy
Caused me to say 'I do'
Or 'I will' - marry ya - Doh!
I'm the guy who
Has a talking dog, Fido
Who still checks your poems - and mine too
And barks at anyone - me included
Who 'forget' to mark certain poems 18+. Doh!
I'm the guy who
Says all these things are true - probably!
I inhabit Cuckoo Land
How do you get there? You ask me
Take the No.7 bus to the moon, then turn left
And it's the second rock on your right!
Heehee
-
Author:
orchidee (
Offline) - Published: March 20th, 2026 03:51
- Comment from author about the poem: A nutty interlude. We have to have them - or else we would go.... nutty?! lol.
- Category: Humor
- Views: 41
- Users favorite of this poem: Doggerel Dave, Tristan Robert Lange, Efrain Cajar, GenXer Sharon 🙏🍀
Offline)
Comments11
Knew a gut that used to search the papers (when there were newspapers) for promotional adds where you would save a penny, nickel or dime on items purchased with the coupon. After cutting them all out he would run about town wasting more gas that he saved in coupons not to speak of his time. To each his own I say. Good write Orchi made me smile again and I hope ya never change.
Thank you SB.
You are most welcome Orchi
You speak for yourself; I do not intend to marry KP after you get a divorce. Now before you spiral out of control and depart to another plane entirely, you have managed to place on record what must be the closest to an autobiography we will ever see, so I intend to fave this. It will then be in a permanent place I can always find and thus keep your memory alive(ish).
Thank you D. Yes, 'tis the true life of Sir Orchi NS in his nutty moments. lol.
Funny that - your comrade in arms, you know, that finch fella you were at the seaside in In Hastings with (did you get a tan?) has just done much the same thing. Do you both know when you depart and where you intend to go?
PS: don't forget to take that hound with yer.....
Orchi, haha this is full-on Cuckoo Land and I’m here for it…as always, my friend. By the time you got to the bus to the moon I lost it. Meanwhile, here at WCAT Broadcasting Company, I swear I can see Popeye off to the side interviewing Ol’ Harry who? while Ol’ Tom’s behind him raising those knitting needles over his head like antennae…of course, the glug glug never ends. 🤣 Always a blast, my friend. 🌹🖤🙏🕯️🐦⬛
Thank you T. Oh, a new member to join Popeye & Co? Harry who?!
Good write O🕊️🙏🏻
Thank you A.
Welcome O🕊️🙏🏻
In War Films they say 'Shoot at Will'. What's Will done for Heavens Sake?
Labels on Underwear say 'Keep away from fire'. Does that mean firemen have to take theirs off before entering a building?
Thank you T. Yes lol. Are those two million year old jokes too, that you've mentioned?!
I wouldn't say they were old, but were originally written in Latin.
Good fun write Orchi but you didn't mention your pet dinosaur I saw you with many years ago. LOL
Andy
Thank you Gold. Yes lol.
You are more nutty than a Topic .. I was gonna say squirrel shit .. but then thought nah .. better be aware of the dog .. Neville
Thank you N.
Love it.
Thank you T.
lol 😂 cuckoo land? I think 🤔 that exists most everywhere!
Thank you GS. lol.
enjoyed - keep them coming
getting to know you and yours through your poems ...
Thank you N. Who wants to know my nutty life and times?! lol.
Maybe interesting unlike our dull everyday lives- who knows 🤔😁
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