The coldest night.

I tell myself to not think about you.

and I consintrate so hard on that.

Just that one thing, trying not to think about you.

Sometimes, I let my mind wander

only just for a moment.

I see you standing there,

my face in your hands.

Feeling so alive.

So free.

I snap back before the best part

plays out in my mind.

it's the coldest night,

I could ever remember.

When your lips touched mine,

my feet weren't on solid ground,

all around, I see green grass, and

birds singing.

This isn't real. It can't be.

Everything about this man

cannot be real. But it was.

And I let myself, feel summer

in the coldest night.

you were all I ever wanted,

and you said you felt the same

but somehow you found yourself

in someone else's bed. Night after night.

Lie after Lie.

When it was done.

I never thought the hole in

my chest would ever close.

and maybe it never did.

There were days that I would not think

about you.

All of a sudden, out of nowhere

and I would think of that night.

Your lips on mine

My heart would seize.

I swore it would jump

out of my troat, and shatter

into a million pieces.

Making a big scene,

in front of everyone

who was already talking

that I was lost, alone.

So they could, poke,

prod and stare at me.

They all say, I should

have known better.

Two years of agony.

Two.

730 days of this.

One day I saw a cowboy

with a tounge ring

walking down the street,

and forgot about you.

How easy it was,

At first.

He used me just like

you did.

I wrote him off.

After the cowboy,

I had a fling with satan.

He was charming,

in a snake sense.

He made me purr under his

bewitching spell.

Then one hot day in june

he went back to hell.

Left me here, to sow the oats

I reaped.

Summer in the city

to recoup my almost broken heart.

Higher than airplanes.

It was so much fun,

It had to end.

Fall came, and

I returned home.

Letters apon letters.

Sorry baby, I know

I did wrong. I'll never

break your heart again.

I believe everything you

say to be true.

So this is the moment,

I knew I could

only ever love you.

Boredem got the best

of me, from time to time.

I slept with them out of

spite.

You had hurt me,

now it's time to ruin you.

My feeling for you,

grew deeper.

I forgot the anger.

I forgot the pain.

I just remember

that coldest day.

How the birds sang.

My feet nor my heart

was on solid ground.

Your lips on mine,

oh, how the sun shined.