Cry and Die- warning has cursing

I just wanna cry
I just wanna die

Words swirl around my head
Smoke rings above a lit cigarette
I can't grasp them
And these smoke rings are drying out my eyes
Even though all I wanna do is cry

My tongue is stained red
From all the bad things I have bred
My eyes are stained green
From all the jealousy I have used to be mean
My legs are stained white
From all the days I have spent inside like night
My cheeks are stained scarlet
From all the blood I have wept
My fingers are stained pink
From all the things that I think
My lips are stained sable
From all the stuff I've screwed up because I'm unstable

I'm a fucking hurricane
'Cause I ruin everything that touches me

I'm a fucking disaster
'Cause everything I say is poison dripping off my tongue

I just wanna cry
I just wanna die

Why am I still alive?
When all I do is ruin everything around me?

I'm a fucking disaster
A stain spilled across a white tablecloth
So why haven't they washed me off?
I don't get it
I'm a fucking disaster