The rainbow shyly kissed
The slopes of the Waianae mountains
Dark clouds pregnant with water
Moving in from the Koolau’s
Ready to give birth to tropical rains
The red and dry Mililani earth
Waiting like an excited virgin
To be embraced and blessed by
The cloud’s wet offspring
Shivering in anticipation
The heavens opening up
Dropping the gift of life
Rain so heavy, so dense,
It obliterates the senses
And leaves us breathless
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Author:
Alfred Peyer (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: August 4th, 2017 00:36
- Comment from author about the poem: The Waianae mountains and the Koolau mountains are the two mountain ranges that dominate the island of Oahu, Hawaii. Mililani is the name of the town where I live, situated on a plateau between the two mountain ranges.
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 71
- User favorite of this poem: whisperingquill.
Offline)
Comments14
You are making me blush! So stop it!
But thank you anyway for your kind comment.
Kat is spot on (if you'll excuse the pun) - this is such a good poem love 'the clouds wet offspring' - simply a great piece.
Thanks so much Michael, I appreciate it.
You nearly took there, great writing
Mahalo Dan, glad you liked it.
First of all you are lucky as hell getting to reside in Hawaii I'm on the east coast
So you are lucky
"The heavens opening up
Dropping the gift of life"
"The cloud’s wet offspring"
"Dark clouds pregnant with water"
Very great lines
Enviable
Really great piece Fred 👍🏼
Thanks wq, I really appreciate your comment!
Yes, it IS nice living in Hawaii, but there are some drawbacks as well. One, we are far away from everybody else, and two, it is expensive here. Paradise is not cheap!
my nostrils are filled with your poem FredPeyer and that along side this piece is a very rainy achieving pleasurable moment. good work FP.
Thank you Kevin, I am happy you liked it. Seriously, while it does not happen very often, I did experience rains so dense, so strong, that it felt as if I was drowning.
Tis a week of rainfall in my Cornwall excursion. Rainfall can keep u indoors and peering out thru windows of meditation.
Thank you b-e, and the rhythmic splitter-splatter on the roof is your meditation mantra.
Your poetic expressions of tropical rain are the best I have read - so real I was cringing with you under that waterfall shawl of dense wet - a first class write Fred.
Thank you Fay, your comment means a lot!
You paint us a lovely, wet picture this morning, Fred! It's a tough place to live, but somebody has to do it. Kudos!
My sentiments exactly! Thank you Louis.
Super write, rain can be so special.
Thanks Goldfinch, in my book rain is VERY special. And there are so many types of rain, from a light drizzle to the tropical storm rain I refer to in the poem.
This is a beautiful poem!
Mahalo Shannon, I am so glad you liked it.
Fred, from now on every time I look up to the sky I will check on the clouds to see if they are pregnant. Loved your so delicately written verses about nature. So beautiful.
Thank you Malu, and when you look up, you can even tell what month they are in!!!
Haha 😂Cute. Today I was pregnant with a poem and now the clouds are pregnant too. Are we in a fertile period?
Wow, wow, wow! Excellent expressive write FP; I can hear it coming down. Your words could easily be the introduction of a great novel, or someone reading an opening to the setting of a movie. I only wish I could use this description when it rains in UK, but it's rarely like this.
Thank you Bibbeck for your kind comment. I visited the UK a few times and did experience the rain there.Growing up in Switzerland I am very familiar with rainy days that are rather depressing. What is so nice about the rains here is that they are usually short with the sun coming out again. It happens every once in a while that when driving from my town to Honolulu (about 15 miles) I encounter three different rainfalls with sunshine in-between. These are usually rather light rains.
Great poem!
Mahalo Joel!
This poem is beautiful and uses such magnificent description, it almost felt like I was there. Absolutely amazing poem!
Mahalo Christina, for your nice comment, hope you did not get wet! 🙂
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