NEVER HAVE I
Never have I ridden a bike wearing a silly helmet
and if ever I did, I’m sorry to say, I’d find it quite repellent
to see my street cred go in a stroke;
I’m certainly not that kind of bloke.
I’ve never gone cycling with a parrot on my shoulder
and I sure don’t want to as I get older
for riding a bike whilst shouldering a bird
is not a practice widely observed.
I’ve never been cycling with a boiled egg on my head
such an activity is something I’d dread
but a fried egg’s okay for should I cough
the chances are it wouldn’t roll off.
I’ve never gone riding wearing lycra
for if I did I know I’d look like a
bit of a prat
and there’s no fun in that.
- Author: Michael Edwards ( Offline)
- Published: April 11th, 2020 01:14
- Comment from author about the poem: Run out of inspiration so heres one from fusions - but not published before ihere in the gallerey or 'community' as it's strangely called. Plus a 10 minute sketch.
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 21
Comments7
Ditto Michael, ditto.
Andy
Ta A.
ANGELA HERE - Good Sabbath Uncle Mike - Love the sketch BRIDGES always fascinate me - especilly *Pack Horse* ! Love the Pome a series of quatrains tells it all. Brian & I were brought to wear cranial protection when cycling. We support headway and as a Physio I have seen the aftermath too many cycling accidents. But I agree *They do look silly* almost like a wig ! In the UK & abroad (where bike is King) i have seen all sorts *Porte a Bicyclette* Dogs - Cats - Monkeys - Children - Wi!ves & Bundles of everything including bags of uncooked eggs. Your Pome made me smile and now I cant stop laughing - at all the EGGS - TRAORDINARY Cylces in my Head ! Brians in the Shower and thinks Ive gone mad in the Computer Room. Thanks for sharing !
Blessings & Peace to You & Yours
Love Angela & Brian 💛💛💛💛💛
Lovin* Lockdown with Brian !
So pleased it gave you a laugh - in truth I fully support the wearing of helmets but don't fancy the idea of wearing one - although I guess I would if enticed to ride a bike after many a long year.
Oh lol, good write and pic M.
I know someone who founded a local Bicycle Hemet Initiative Trust (similar to Headway).
I visited someone in hospital, years ago now, weekly for about 4 months - cycling accident with no helmet, and sadly passed away. The Trust was founded due to this.
You could wear a hemet in the shower and recycle the water.
I can't picture you as a lycra cycler either ...... but hiding from this disease'll keep ya by your easel.
Excellent verses of fun.
have you considered cycling
with eggs that are poached
but my word you're a natural
you must have been coached
Oh cripes - no I never considered poached eggs but did try scrambled which help if you go scrambling.
I just luv a bit o abstract absurdity.. the idea of a fried egg on me Barnett makes me cringe....
I never been cyclin wearin
a dress or a fez, or facial
fuzz
aint gonna say why
Let's just say becuz ….
Go good sir,
Neville
If you don't fancy the idea of a fried egg you try bacon. Cheers N.
A good bit of fun, this. What with helmets, parrots, and eggs on one's head.I was envisioning scenes of Monty Python. Thanks for the laugh. - Phil A
Sheer madness - but it helps keep the spirits up - thanks Phil.
Once a helmet saved my life
I wore it rather loosely
He came back once and saved the wife
I thanked him, quite profusely
Great write Michael
Helmets are like insurance
No-one wants it until you need it
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