Notice of absence from Doggerel Dave
Not absent - still here!
Keep Calm and Carry On Poeming. 😂
Not absent - still here!
Keep Calm and Carry On Poeming. 😂
Another oldie exhumed from my memory of a wasted youth. Rhymery added for polish and class. 🤣
Gentleman invited to fancy dress;
For simplicity decided on ‘Adam’.
Felt he could attire himself without stress:
Ordered a codpiece embroidered 'Big Ram’.
.
He returned three times - coverage not great……
Store stretched upgrades to final ‘Extra Large’.
But all replacements proved inadequate.
At this point the store, out of stock, took charge:
.
Dear sir,
We regret that our range of codpieces does not satisfactorily cover your needs. For this we apologise.
May we suggest that you take the matter into your own hands, throw it over your shoulder and go as a petrol pump.
Kind regards
-
Author:
Doggerel Dave (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: November 2nd, 2024 22:24
- Comment from author about the poem: A case of envy I don’t really want to talk about…. 😂
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 18
- Users favorite of this poem: Cheeky Missy
Offline)
Comments6
Pump envy ............ you norty old Dog you 😉👍
I'm saying nothing.... Who said what to whom?
Bragging again eh Dave? LOL
Andy
I'm.........as per my response to Neville (above). Thanks, however for your attention so early, Andy.
A little humor always settles the stomach in the morning. This one was a gas.
'Gas'? Plenty of room for farts there.......? Will keep the party mooning. This is becoming......
In the US gas is petrol like petting the old role
You are getting more and more cryptic, Soren - what's up?
Bowser! ⛽️
Thanks for the suggestion, Rik. And I'm sure that you are right in a contemporary sense. However when I first heard this story, more years ago than I care to relate (my excuse is that I was young and immature at the time) the current usage was definitely 'Petrol pump'. So a decision had to be made: Update or keep to the cultural norms of the period. I opted to retain the feel of the times....😜
And a good choice as well! 👍🏻 They did say “at the pump” a lot back then.
Wot about "under the pump"? Way I feel here, sometimes......😂
Oh yeah, true, true!
Well, thank you for giving me a delighted chuckle of happy laughter with THAT conclusion! Whether or not the main character did pull off posing in his birthday suit sans Eve likewise to accompany him shall not be disclosed herein, however his case is too excellently rendered with superb imagery, a delightfully haunting poignancy, and such good humor I'm left still smiling with my eyes twinkling. Thank you very much for sharing!
Quite right too, Missy. Despite extensive research, I could find no reliable record of the outcome of these negotiations - not even an exact location with respect to the party/ball/whatever.
Really pleased that you derived a modicum of humour therein and that perhaps it lightened your day somewhat.... 😊
🤣🤣
I'm glad the beleaguered store
finally took charge! 😱
I know Wal-Mart has a codpiece
triple extra large., they are rare!
So I bought a TWO pack
whil'st I was there!! 🤪
Thanks for sharing 🙏 !!
Best regards ✌️ peace Thad
I remember! (shows my memory ain't that bad) You were a star on episode six, People of Walmart, series 184. I'm sure you've had more five minutes of fame than that, Thad - when can we expect your memoir?😇
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