On edge

sorenbarrett

On a puzzle's edge where there is no form
Inside a thought riding a storm
Assembling holes into a tarnished dream
Rusted memories fall from a raveled seam

Thorn broken sticks the rose
A blossom without her clothes
Garments of pink bleed red
Droplets floating overhead

Waves of floral silk make a pool
Wilted echoes wrought by a fool
Yellow and blue sprout green
Planted seeds never seen

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Comments +

Comments13

  • orchidee

    Good write SB.

    • sorenbarrett

      Thanks Orchi your read is most appreciated

    • arqios

      Loving the title choice on this one Soren, sets up the whole poem with tension, instability and vulnerability. In its chaos, offering a profound exploration of memory, pain, and the subtle hint of potential for renewal. An thought provoking 'portrait' of the intricate and often turbulent nature of our minds, and the enduring hope that lies beneath the surface.

      • sorenbarrett

        Thanks Cryptic very observant on your part this one is an onion that I did not really expect anyone to peel.

        • arqios

          Onions make me tear up but their unique pungence and aromatic flavour is so enticing. Worth it! I feel 'safe' diving into your poetry.

        • Mutley Ravishes

          "Inside a thought riding a storm." One of the best lines I've ever read, Soren!

          • sorenbarrett

            Thank you very much Mutley your encouraging words are deeply valued

          • 2781

            Take off to many layers and God knows what you find!

            • sorenbarrett

              Thanks 2781 for the review and comment yes earth, skin and poetry is made in layers.

            • Tristan Robert Lange

              I have absolutely had those thoughts ride those storms and they can be friggin' turbulent. On edge indeed. Well expressed, my friend. The imagery in this is rich, surreal and multilayered, just the way I like it. Well done! 👍

              • sorenbarrett

                Thank you so much Tristan for the review and most kind words of support they are always welcome and valued.

              • Teddy.15

                Just beautiful dearest Sorrenbarret 🌹

                • sorenbarrett

                  Thank you Teddy your words are most supportive and appreciated

                • Michael Edwards

                  A great read - it flows and worth another visit.

                  • sorenbarrett

                    Thank you Michael I appeciate your read and comment.

                  • Bella Shepard

                    Metaphorically sublime, rhythmicaly beautiful, such a gem!

                    • sorenbarrett

                      Thank you so much Bella so good to hear from you your comment is appreciated. Have a wonderful Chistmas

                    • Cassie58

                      A stream of thoughts which appear to be random, almost like over thinking. Interesting imagery Soren. Beautifully penned.

                      • sorenbarrett

                        Thanks Cassie for the read and comment you are so kind

                      • Thomas W Case

                        Tremendous imagery.

                        • sorenbarrett

                          Thank you Thomas for the review and kind words

                        • Thad Wilk

                          A fantastic poem
                          the imagery out of sight! 👍
                          Great rhyme, rhythm and flow,
                          a treat to recite!! 💯👏
                          My pleasure to read indeed!!
                          Best regards ✌️ peace Thad

                          • sorenbarrett

                            Thanks so much Thad I always am grateful for your reviews and comments

                          • Goldfinch60

                            We all have had those problems on the edge of our lives soren but to reach the age I have I have overcome them.

                            Andy

                            • sorenbarrett

                              Thank you Andy for the read and comment as always they are most appreciated.

                            • Sealgair

                              Great job!



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