FIVE SEVEN FIVES
Dominion of mind.
Dark shadow in attendance.
Lost to evil thoughts.
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It is not just our genes;
it is how we nurture ourselves
that will define us.
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In the midst of life
in desolating routine
robbed of volition.
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Author:
Michael Edwards (
Offline) - Published: September 6th, 2017 00:00
- Comment from author about the poem: Another of my line drawings . I have been much influenced in these by the work of Benjamin Chee Chee - the Canadian First Nation artist
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 108
Offline)
Comments7
Good ones Michael, especially the second one.
Thanks Andy - No2 now clearly in the lead.
Fine writes and pic M. I may do 2 or 3 at once, then have a backlog waiting to post them. Other days none at all. I don't plan how many per day. Just depends how things go.
Cheers Orchi. I do try to post one per day but with my more serious poems they can take some while to both write and perfect (not they ever do achieve perfection - if only). The result is that I find myself writing short less demanding pieces to keep up - might take a bit of time off soon to work on longer works.
I'm not bragging, but most of my poems don't seem to take too long to write. I suppose we don't have to rhyme every time. Oops, just rhymed there! lol. Maybe try a sort of extempore, free-flow piece, as if writing a paragraph, or a sort of précis piece. Just a couple of suggestions.
Don't often write in rhyme - well not in my serious stuff - but can't stop myself writing in meter - might try writing something in a sort paragraph but it takes you away from poetry - just painted a couple of window sills since my last comment and now it's four radiators - it's going to be one of those days.
Thanks MICHAEL ~ love No. 2 ~ love anything in GENES
She was BRAZILIAN
She wiggled and her big end
Justified the JEANS !
Pleas check my 822 ~ Thanks BRIAN
Cheers Brian
Just love the middle three liner here Michael - so so true is this short statement
Looks like is the clear winner - thanks Fay
What a challenge to write like this good work Michael
A challenge but good fun but wait till you see tomorrows - if it's finished that is - thanks Bill
I find this style of writing challenging. You like Santita make it look easy I've made one attempt perhaps I'll take another shot. Excellent work nicely tied together.
M
The restriction in syllable count is not easy to meet but like all things practice helps - anyway these turned out quite reasonable - thanks for your kind encouragement.
What are the birds doing? Are they counting syllables or are they trying to discuss about the poems?
Is this another invention?
Love the poems.
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