THE HOUSE

Michael Edwards

 

THE HOUSE

 

 

Behind her the gloom

of the woods and shrubberies

with dark paths and long shadows.

 

Before her the house

with unlit porch and bare rooms

and damp mould infested walls.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  • Author: Michael Edwards (Offline Offline)
  • Published: October 20th, 2017 00:08
  • Comment from author about the poem: The Sedoka is an unrhymed poem made up of two three-line katauta presented as a single poem with the following syllable counts: 5/7/7, 5/7/7. It addresses the same subject from differing perspectives. (A katauta is an unrhymed three-line poem the following syllable counts: 5/7/7).
  • Category: Unclassified
  • Views: 30
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Comments +

Comments8

  • Goldfinch60

    Good write Michael. Good to see you back.
    I like the artwork, have you previously put up a picture of the same scene but with people in it?

    • Michael Edwards

      Thanks Andy - no not of this scene but something similar - this one is of Wigston in Leicestershire.

    • Laura🌻

      Michael,
      Great poem! Short and packed with a meaningful message!
      Open the doors, and let the sun shine in!
      Beautiful painting to illustrate your Sedoka!

      • Michael Edwards

        Thank you Laura - not as easy as they look but the effect of the strict structure can work really well.

      • orchidee

        A fine write M.

      • BRIAN & ANGELA

        Thanks MICHAEL welcome back ! Love the SEDOKA ~ sound like my Grandma's House ! Love the English Village picture ~ very evocative ! BRIAN ~ Please check my TEDDY BEAR ~ Thanks B.

        • Michael Edwards

          Thanks Brian - short welcome break in Madeira - didn't write as much as I hoped but quite a few odds and ends.

        • WL Schuett

          Nice return poem Michael, lovely watercolor.

        • Louis Gibbs

          I had no idea there were so many specific forms of poetry, Michael. The painting is quite inviting and warm! Well done!

          • Michael Edwards

            Thanks Louis - the trouble with most of them is that they specify too many stanzas which means a heck of a lot of thinking ....!

          • Fay Slimm.

            Super artwork and love the form used
            - it reads like the beginning of a novel and left me wanting more -- so good to see you back posting again Michael.

            • Michael Edwards

              Thanks Fay - yes it does invite Chapter 2 but the mind's blank at the moment.

            • MendedFences27

              A great beginning to what could be a greater poem. We want to know what happens next? It seems the structure lends itself to a one-sentence format quite nicely. So, now we have two in contrast, and that's what peaks the interest and leaves us wanting more. It's almost as though you asked an unanswered question. Lovely bit of intrigue brought out to leave us pondering, "Where does she go next?" Loved it. More, please? - Phil A.

              • Michael Edwards

                Thanks so much Phil for taking your time to read and comment - so much appreciated - - like you I would like to know what happens next. I guess one of the tools in writing poetry is to stir the readers imagination and leave them with questions - anyway not saying this is a great write but it certainly has resulted in questions being raised.



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