I went for a walk
Had to get out of
The house
Too many memories
Of you, your body
Your voice
Can’t stand it anymore
To stay in the room
Where we made love
That lovers bed is now
Only an unmade
Messy relic
The stained mattress
Sweat soaked sheets
Telling the story
Where life was beautiful
Where we had a future
But not anymore
That future went
The way of the Dodo
Gone, finished, kaput
I am now
An actor
Without a play
-
Author:
Alfred Peyer (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: November 7th, 2017 01:10
- Category: Love
- Views: 44
- Users favorite of this poem: Accidental Poet, myself and me
Offline)
Comments10
Simple straight and punchy - a superb work Fred
Thank you Michael, I actually like these kind of poems. Straight to the point, no frilly talk around the bush. Am really glad you like it, I worried that it was too simple.
Good write, you may well be an actor without a play but you certainly are a poet with a fine pen.
Thanks so much Goldfinch, you just made my evening!
Expressing your feelings is what poetry is all about Fred. And done here so well.
Thanks so much AP, we try, don't we?
For all the trying here at MPS, there's a wide range of success amongst all the poets I know here. I think we all rub off on each other. We're a contagious bunch Fred.
Thanks FRED ~ The whole World's a stage and we poor souls merely "extras" in life's great Epics ~ Triumphs & Tragedies ~ we have to make the most of each art we are called on to play ~ Angela & I are enjoying "Love Story" ! Yours BRIAN. Please "Send Someone Flowers" using my latest FUSION and enjoy a cyber massage in my Aromatherapy Poem ~ Thanks B.
Thanks Brian, great comment, give my regards to your 'Love Story' star Angela!
This is a great poem, Fred! Very descriptive and to the point! Awesome!
Thanks Christina, am experimenting with short lines, trying to express as much as possible with as few words as possible.
I like this Fred simple yet you got across the feeling of a lost love ....
Thanks WL, please see my answer to Christina's comment.
"An actor without a play" ... what a great line! More meaningful to me as I'm currently taking an acting class, just for fun. the poem is beautiful, and I like the consistent three-line-per-phrase structure. Well organized! Kudos, Fred!
Thanks so much Louis! And how is the acting coming along? Will Broadway be next? When you become famous I will have bragging rights that I knew you before!
Do you mean before I was laughed off the stage?
Simple yet wonderful writing. How about a one-man show?
m&m, you found the solution! Thanks! And in this one-man/woman show we are actor, director, writer, all rolled into one.
A beautiful write Fred! So simple yet complex at the same time
Thank you skye, I am experimenting with what I call 'minimalist' poems.
Minimal wording, maximum effect. Sometimes less is more. I believe for this poem it works to bring an air of honesty and true emotion. More descriptions would make it seem less true, as though something was being disguised in the verbiage. Loved this one. Felt the pain. - Phil A..
Thanks so much Phil! Am experimenting around with what I call minimalist poems. Tomorrow there will be one with even less words per line.
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