FredPeyer

Life is a Mess

I grab the empty bottles

Put the glasses into the sink

Pick up my dirty underwear

Empty the overflowing ashtray

Open the window wide

To renew the air in the room

Where last night

We had talked, and smoked

Finished all the bottles

Of my cheap red wine

 

I straighten the pillows

On the old dirty couch

Where last night

We had fumbled around

Drunkenly but eager

Laughing about our inability

To fuck properly

Too drunk to get it up

Too befuddled

To know better

 

I broom the floor

Where last night

We had danced

All naked

Holding on to

Each other

Listening to music

We did not understand

To love songs

We did not believe in

 

I am cleaning up

The mess

That is my life

Comments15

  • olivergreenwood19

    Beautiful write and eerily true

    • FredPeyer

      Thank you oliver! This is not biographical, purely a result of my overly active imagination! But hell yeah, it could be true!

    • Louis Gibbs

      Sounds like a hell-of-a party! Clever write, Fred. hope your hang-over isn't too severe.

      • FredPeyer

        Thanks Louis, if there is a hang-over it is purely imaginary!

      • Goldfinch60

        Super write, your imagination seems to have given you a great party.

        • FredPeyer

          Thanks Goldfinch! And that is all it is....imagination!

        • Michael Edwards

          I can see the scene (and wonder what you did with those under pants) - so descriptive - great write.

          • FredPeyer

            Well, Michael, if you dance naked, your dirty underwear has to go somewhere! It was put there strictly to paint the scene!

            • Michael Edwards

              :)

            • orchidee

              A fine write Fred. Would I get past 'fumbling' without swooning?! heehee.

              • FredPeyer

                Thanks orchidee, I think you would have fainted way before the second bottle was emptied!

              • Accidental Poet

                Fred, it's a scenario that anyone could be portrayed in. Power to your imagination!

                • FredPeyer

                  Thanks AP, if this is a 20 something, you call it the wild years. If it is a 40 or over somebody, you would call it a loser. I think sometimes about how the perception of something we do changes with age.

                  • Accidental Poet

                    One word Fred... maturity! But then, there is a child in all of us that wants to stay young.

                  • 1 more comment

                  • myself and me

                    What a wild life to clean up, hope the underwear could be cleaned properly. :)

                    • FredPeyer

                      m&m, it is amazing how much attention that underwear got! I am starting to think that it might be a no-no to ever mention under garments in poems! :-)
                      How I came up with it is that I was trying to picture the scene in my mind: Empty bottles lying around, that overfilled ashtray, and clothes strewn all over. Maybe I should have had the guy pick up a pink bra! :-)

                    • Fay Slimm.

                      Your mind thinks in lateral style like all good poets Fred - -could really feel the sad realization of that sobering morning-after.

                      • FredPeyer

                        Thanks so much Fay! I think a poet's mind is all over the place. From reading your oh so beautiful poems I get the feeling that your mind sometimes even leaves the body.
                        And thank you for picking up on that 'sobering morning-after' feeling that I really tried to convey.

                      • BRIAN & ANGELA

                        wow SOME PARTY ! I'm much too young for such shenanigans ! Thanks for baring (your soul !) ~ Yours BRIAN !

                        • FredPeyer

                          Thank you Brian, if you never danced naked, you should try it one day. Just don't do it in public! :-)
                          Am not so sure I 'bared my soul', after all it was my imagination that wrote it.

                          • BRIAN & ANGELA

                            Thanks FRED for baring your imagination ! I have been at Music Festivals where some of the audience danced naked in the Rain ~ I maintained my modesty by keeping my cycle cape on ! Fortunately it was not too windy ~ always a problem for My Scots Friends ! Yours BRIAN

                          • Simple-Man87

                            Wow. I loved this. Incredibly realistic, so vivid. Well done. Thank you.

                            • FredPeyer

                              Thanks simple-man! But tell me, if you 'know' it is realistic, you must have 'been there - done that'! :-) Just kidding! Thanks for reading and commenting!

                              • Simple-Man87

                                Sir, I have been trying to sweep up my lifes mess for the past 2 years. And I think we've ALL danced naked at some point. lol.

                              • Christina8

                                You have a great imagination. I too have dabbled in "fantasy" poems. They are fun to do and yours was so well done! Very vivid imagery. Felt like I was watching this scene play out!

                                • FredPeyer

                                  Thank you so much Christina! Where would we be without our imagination?

                                • kevin browne

                                  you been hiding somewhere, Fred Peyer?

                                  • FredPeyer

                                    Hiding behind my own insecurities, but I am now peeking out a little bit!

                                    • kevin browne

                                      good man.

                                    • MendedFences27

                                      Never, ever, clean up completely. Always leave some small reminder of what was.That way, you'll find thi/ongs later, and ask yourself, I wonder who these belong to?"
                                      Great poem, honest and sincere, imaginative based experience, defining the aging process, and one hell of a party. - Phil A.

                                      • FredPeyer

                                        Thanks so much, MF! Love that 'thi/ongs', you are not only a good writer, but also an inventor of new words! But you know, it can be dangerous to leave the thi/ongs out. Who knows who will be at the next party?

                                      • LAWLESS

                                        Damn man, you're on fire! I've rarely seen this site so lit up. Maybe everyone's lit on that cheap wine!

                                        I'm enjoying this simpler format, I've grown weary of all the complexities getting tossed about. This one was very fun to read and I greatly appreciate that.

                                        I'm a sucker for any poem with the word "fuck" in it!! 😜

                                        Lawless

                                        PS- you might not want to call MendedFences MF!

                                        • FredPeyer

                                          Thanks so much Lawless! Great comment! And you are right, did not know what MF stands for, will call him mendedF from now on! :-)

                                        • Poetic Dan

                                          Just what I needed for my first read in a while thank you such.

                                          • FredPeyer

                                            Glad to be of service! Thanks so much PD!



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