MELT
Her
teardrops
fell as rain
slowly quenching
the flame of love’s desire that burnt within
her heart, as dreams dissolved and left no trace
like drifting snow
in springtime
slowly
melts.
- Author: Michael Edwards ( Offline)
- Published: January 23rd, 2018 01:10
- Comment from author about the poem: Tetractys, a poetic form which consists of 5 lines of 1, 2, 3, 4, 10 syllables (total of 20). Tetractys can be written with more than one verse, but must follow suit with an inverted syllable count. .
- Category: Unclassified
- Views: 38
- Users favorite of this poem: myself and me
Comments9
Very good write Michael both in form and emotion.
Thanks Andy - it's never easy working within such tight constraints but the result is okayish.
good write and form Michael. I'm busy fussing over metres! Not the 100 metres race though. lol.
the 100 metre race is a hurdle too far - cheers Orchi/
I think the result is more than 'okayish'! You not only followed the rules of this poem, but at the same time managed to convey something tender, meaningful and beautiful at the same time. Kudos!
Do me a favor though, write something real bad so we can rip you apart instead of having to look for more and more nice things to say! 🙂
I've got a super reject which I'll post tomorrow - be interested what others make of it. thanks Fred.
Well done Michael. No easy task at all, but you aced it.
Yup = sort of made it. Cheers AP
I love poems that build and fade! Nice Michael!
Thanks sr
Love the Structure Michael ~ but my question is "Where did the SNOWGIRL GO ? Thanks BRIAN
Snowsign of her here - thanks Brian.
Interesting poetic form, Michael. You do love a challenge, don't you.
Yes I love to try them out restrictive though they are.
Thank you Michael.
What a beautiful, vivid poem.
I love the picture too it adds to the poem's brilliance.
Keep writing
FineB
Thanks FB - the picture was inspired by the paving not far from our apartment in Cyprus - I saw it and took a few photos - I'm sure the locals thought I was bonkers.
The quenching and slowly melts caught all the feelings.
Marvelous writing.
Thank you for your kind words m&m
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