MELT

Michael Edwards

 

 

MELT

 

Her

teardrops

fell as rain

slowly quenching

the flame of love’s desire that burnt within

her heart, as dreams dissolved and left no trace

like drifting snow

in springtime

slowly

melts.

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

  • Author: Michael Edwards (Offline Offline)
  • Published: January 23rd, 2018 01:10
  • Comment from author about the poem: Tetractys, a poetic form which consists of 5 lines of 1, 2, 3, 4, 10 syllables (total of 20). Tetractys can be written with more than one verse, but must follow suit with an inverted syllable count. .
  • Category: Unclassified
  • Views: 38
  • Users favorite of this poem: myself and me
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Comments +

Comments9

  • Goldfinch60

    Very good write Michael both in form and emotion.

    • Michael Edwards

      Thanks Andy - it's never easy working within such tight constraints but the result is okayish.

    • orchidee

      good write and form Michael. I'm busy fussing over metres! Not the 100 metres race though. lol.

      • Michael Edwards

        the 100 metre race is a hurdle too far - cheers Orchi/

      • FredPeyer

        I think the result is more than 'okayish'! You not only followed the rules of this poem, but at the same time managed to convey something tender, meaningful and beautiful at the same time. Kudos!
        Do me a favor though, write something real bad so we can rip you apart instead of having to look for more and more nice things to say! 🙂

        • Michael Edwards

          I've got a super reject which I'll post tomorrow - be interested what others make of it. thanks Fred.

        • Accidental Poet

          Well done Michael. No easy task at all, but you aced it.

        • Lorna

          I love poems that build and fade! Nice Michael!

        • BRIAN & ANGELA

          Love the Structure Michael ~ but my question is "Where did the SNOWGIRL GO ? Thanks BRIAN

          • Michael Edwards

            Snowsign of her here - thanks Brian.

          • Louis Gibbs

            Interesting poetic form, Michael. You do love a challenge, don't you.

            • Michael Edwards

              Yes I love to try them out restrictive though they are.

            • FineB

              Thank you Michael.

              What a beautiful, vivid poem.

              I love the picture too it adds to the poem's brilliance.

              Keep writing
              FineB

              • Michael Edwards

                Thanks FB - the picture was inspired by the paving not far from our apartment in Cyprus - I saw it and took a few photos - I'm sure the locals thought I was bonkers.

              • myself and me

                The quenching and slowly melts caught all the feelings.
                Marvelous writing.

                • Michael Edwards

                  Thank you for your kind words m&m



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