Battiness and Barminess - 1066

orchidee



Well,here it is again

Time for the 1066 Annual Reunion

14th October 1066

Hastings, England, UK

So that Americans and other friends

Know what I'm wittering on about!

 

Now you're all invited

There's only one condition - 

You have to have been there in person in 1066!

Well, we shall let some of you in

If you were not there in person

Give you a special invite

 

I'm going with Fido

My '18+' watchdog

He will save me from anything

Too 'exciting' or 'swoony'

I'm sure he overdoes it though

'Woof, woof, woof!'

'Quiet Fido, not now!'

 

I should be banned from it for life, ya know

But why?

Well, I mucked it all up

William The Conquerer was busy playing conkers

And there was a terrible draught

Cos it was Autumn, after all

 

He said 'Ooh, I'm not getting on me horse

On a day like this

I will get blown off it!'

(Erm, he later appeared in 'Carry on, follow that camel'

When things were less windy)

So I took command

 

Then I uttered those immortal words to Harold

Oh woe, they were fateful words:

'Look up, Sire', and he did

Just at the moment an arrow flew...

And the rest is history!

 

You can call me 'Fossil'

Anyone attending this reunion

Must normally be over 952 years old!

That'll be 99% of you then. Heehee

 

See ya there

Fido says bring my water syphon

To add it to drinks during the celebrations

What? You're not gonna bother to turn up then?!

 

Here's Fido and friends in the clip - Ahhh! lol.

 

  • Author: orchidee (Offline Offline)
  • Published: October 13th, 2018 01:33
  • Comment from author about the poem: Erm, not a hymn, and not really a poem. Just bonkers ramblings!
  • Category: Humor
  • Views: 31
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Comments4

  • Michael Edwards

    It's a pity the Jester won't be there - he died on the battle field before he had a chance to try one of Syllas fairy cakes. There will be plenty of them for Harolds lot and snail risotto for Williams.Will you be at Battle for the opening ceremony?

    • Goldfinch60

      Snail risotto is fine by me.

      What do you mean the Jester won't be there - Orchi's coming!

      • Michael Edwards

        There must have been two of them - wasn't a jestor the first to be killed at the Battle - and Orchi is still alive - isn't he?

      • 1 more comment

      • Goldfinch60

        I am on my way. I do have a fast horse so I will be there waiting for you and will rid you of your water syphon, perhaps I will give it all to Fido, he deserves a drink after all the Woof, woofing he has done. I will then be able to drink my Laphroaig knowing that you will not be putting any of that devilish water in it.

        See you there.
        Goldie the Whisky Drinker.

        • orchidee

          Thanks Gold. We'll have a mad old time!

          • Michael Edwards

            I drink whisky - can't think of any other use for it - off to put a stamp on my chain mail.

          • BRIAN & ANGELA

            Ooooooooo You Mad Dogs & Englishmen : I've just woken up on Sunday Morning (7am) looking for some Spiritual uplift from UNCLE STEVE and I get MAD : BAD : SAD and that's just the DOGS ! I'm convinced ENGLISH MEN get madder as they mature : BRIAN @ 35 is still 90% SANE ! Love it all : pero no comprende nadia !
            Blessings & Love for FIDO : A N G E L A 🧡🧡🧡🧡

            • orchidee

              Thanks Angela. Can ya hear me singing, and telling news of this 1066 reunion from this seemingly sound-proof cell? The one that two men in white coats put me in?! heehee.

            • Neville

              I reckon you have either got your ajin court, or have been on the bottle of Hastings..

              • orchidee

                Thanks N. lol.



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