Once more the battle is remembered,
Nine hundred and fifty two years ago this day
The Normans came from the sea in boats of wood
To try to conquer the English.
Harold and his troops were there,
To stop the Normans,
Unfortunately so was Orchi,
So full of mischief, pork pies and sherry.
“Do you want water in that?” he said,
Pointing to my whisky.
I tried to hit him,
But he moved so fast,
Very fast for a man full of pork pies.
Harold came to us and spoke,
“Hello Goldie, can I have a scotch?”
“Of course you can Sire” I replied,
Orchi then spoke,
“Sire, what is that in the sky?”
Harold looked up and tragedy came,
As the arrow hit him in the eye
He spilled my scotch.
It was a good job Harold died,
As the wrath of Goldie at the spilled whisky
Would have ensured he would sing soprano
For the rest of his life.
“The Battle of Hastings, 14th October, 1066 – Orchi and I were there”
-
Author:
Goldfinch60 (Pseudonym) (
Offline) - Published: October 14th, 2018 01:46
- Comment from author about the poem: Nine Hundred and fifty two years ago today, 14th October 1066, at the Battle of Hastings was the day when England was last successfully invaded by the Normans and defeated. It was Orchi's fault.
- Category: Special occasion
- Views: 17
Offline)
Comments5
Oohh thanks for the official version of this Gold! Michael and others are coming to the reunion today. Two men waiting for us afterwards - with white coats on, to take us away! heehee.
Ooooooooo UNCLE ANDY : You are all MAD : But i love you all ! The ENGLISH have such a sharp sense of Humour which is something I miss in NZ ! In Essex (where Brian & I live) we have lots of Cockneys with their Rhyming Slang and supreme optimism. One of them said to me a while back : Fank Gord fer Brexit : I wont 'ave ter take the Trouble (and Strife = Wife) ter MAGORKA no more fer 'Olidays : Itl be SOUFEND next year ! Have a Happy 1066 Reunion : Love to JOYCE & YOURSELF : ANGELA 🧡🧡🧡🧡 Please check Brians BLUEBELLS : Thanks A ! Love LEE MARVIN & Wanderin' Star : WICKED VIDEO !
I'm wearing my new designer breast plate and the fairy cakes look so colourful. And a grand time will be had by all.
Well I'll go polish my sword if that aint Monty Donn over there planting some poppies.
We carved our names on a tree there, and also 'We Woz Ere'?
Did England as we know it actually exist in 1066? Cornwall refused to be a part of england for a long time. Would be fun to think parts of our history showed a resistence to European invaders which has re-emerged in our Brexit of today.
One in the eye for a second referendum.
To be able to comment and rate this poem, you must be registered. Register here or if you are already registered, login here.