Comments received on poems by Jalso
spending my time
Cheeky Missy said:
The conclusion is only too fitting and yet added a seeming touch of humor to a more serious discussion, especially when I am inclined to take you seriously. Very interesting hypothetical expose. Delightful end-rhyming. The repetition of the first line excellently keeps the focus midst the varied scenes.
August 31st, 2011 21:42
Cheeky Missy said:
The conclusion is only too fitting and yet added a seeming touch of humor to a more serious discussion, especially when I am inclined to take you seriously. Very interesting hypothetical expose. Delightful end-rhyming. The repetition of the first line excellently keeps the focus midst the varied scenes.
August 31st, 2011 21:42
Timeline skip
Cheeky Missy said:
Throwing in that reference to the Illuminati is not exactly a light measure. It adds such seriousness to this that the other metaphors or situations take on more interest; on the other hand, it could all be ignorant chatter. Very interesting, to say the least.
August 31st, 2011 21:36
Cheeky Missy said:
Throwing in that reference to the Illuminati is not exactly a light measure. It adds such seriousness to this that the other metaphors or situations take on more interest; on the other hand, it could all be ignorant chatter. Very interesting, to say the least.
August 31st, 2011 21:36
stuff
Cheeky Missy said:
For bored with nothing to do, this fits. The touch of rhyming is nice and the imagery curious. The author's note really helps make sense of something a bit like nonsense. Interesting.
August 31st, 2011 21:31
Cheeky Missy said:
For bored with nothing to do, this fits. The touch of rhyming is nice and the imagery curious. The author's note really helps make sense of something a bit like nonsense. Interesting.
August 31st, 2011 21:31
nite
Cheeky Missy said:
Interesting, and a tad engaging with good imagery conveying a sense of the seeming situation, which is rather eerie and yet seems almost common too. The rhyming and touch of rythm adds to the enjoyment.
August 31st, 2011 21:27
Cheeky Missy said:
Interesting, and a tad engaging with good imagery conveying a sense of the seeming situation, which is rather eerie and yet seems almost common too. The rhyming and touch of rythm adds to the enjoyment.
August 31st, 2011 21:27
Indigo children
Cheeky Missy said:
Your author's note is helpful to little me. This is a very interesting tribute to your introduction to the curious specimen of "indigo children." Wow.
August 31st, 2011 21:22
Cheeky Missy said:
Your author's note is helpful to little me. This is a very interesting tribute to your introduction to the curious specimen of "indigo children." Wow.
August 31st, 2011 21:22
Dad
Dolphine29 said:
I am glad you wrote this, you need to write this out loud.
I can understand when ur father is the putrid puss that eats the fungus that eats a wound; so you are not alone. The important thing is to get out of that and live your life without pleasing them or enduring pain, neglect, torture, rape or murderer; as many "Fathers" do to their children .. . so FUCK the saying "you will honor your father and mother" if they don't treat you with love and respect why shoudl you? or anybody for that matter. Take care
bye
June 4th, 2011 17:17
Dolphine29 said:
I am glad you wrote this, you need to write this out loud.
I can understand when ur father is the putrid puss that eats the fungus that eats a wound; so you are not alone. The important thing is to get out of that and live your life without pleasing them or enduring pain, neglect, torture, rape or murderer; as many "Fathers" do to their children .. . so FUCK the saying "you will honor your father and mother" if they don't treat you with love and respect why shoudl you? or anybody for that matter. Take care
bye
June 4th, 2011 17:17
goodbye
Emi said:
Really sad... I hope you weren't writing about something you actually want to do... :(
May 19th, 2011 18:09
Emi said:
Really sad... I hope you weren't writing about something you actually want to do... :(
May 19th, 2011 18:09
the wind
Dolphine29 said:
Love this!! For me is like a way to keep going.
NIce
Best
Dolphine
April 20th, 2011 18:18
Dolphine29 said:
Love this!! For me is like a way to keep going.
NIce
Best
Dolphine
April 20th, 2011 18:18
i am the government
Alexandre Landsley said:
This is so true... we nothing but puppets and at the end the government just deceive us..
April 2nd, 2011 10:19
Alexandre Landsley said:
This is so true... we nothing but puppets and at the end the government just deceive us..
April 2nd, 2011 10:19
gravity
Dolphine29 said:
Very moving. I find the expression "I want to live I chose to live" as the way I believe we desire to understand why are we here? and that in truth we decided to come here and live. I still don't know exactly why... but I keep my eyes and heart open to find one day the answer.
Thank you for sharing
Best
Dolphine
March 28th, 2011 18:59
Dolphine29 said:
Very moving. I find the expression "I want to live I chose to live" as the way I believe we desire to understand why are we here? and that in truth we decided to come here and live. I still don't know exactly why... but I keep my eyes and heart open to find one day the answer.
Thank you for sharing
Best
Dolphine
March 28th, 2011 18:59
Crumble
Emi said:
I really love this poem. I think the repeating of "crumble" so many times is really effective. Awesome job. :)
March 24th, 2011 14:30
Emi said:
I really love this poem. I think the repeating of "crumble" so many times is really effective. Awesome job. :)
March 24th, 2011 14:30
do you know what i mean (English)
Cheeky Missy said:
Wowser! Thanks a TON for the translation....what a marvelous, and intriguing piece....oooh! And how eerie too, ending with such an inescapable warning, yet question, as if....? Fascinating.....I enjoyed it.
February 25th, 2011 12:46
Cheeky Missy said:
Wowser! Thanks a TON for the translation....what a marvelous, and intriguing piece....oooh! And how eerie too, ending with such an inescapable warning, yet question, as if....? Fascinating.....I enjoyed it.
February 25th, 2011 12:46
do you know what I mean?
Cheeky Missy said:
If you don't mind....would you translate it into English for me? The second stanza's about laughing, right? If not, sorry to bother you. Have a great day!
February 23rd, 2011 23:37
Cheeky Missy said:
If you don't mind....would you translate it into English for me? The second stanza's about laughing, right? If not, sorry to bother you. Have a great day!
February 23rd, 2011 23:37
for you
Cheeky Missy said:
But, the devil isn't wanting to be set free....since when? It's his prey that needs freedom, seems to me.
January 27th, 2011 14:40
Cheeky Missy said:
But, the devil isn't wanting to be set free....since when? It's his prey that needs freedom, seems to me.
January 27th, 2011 14:40
such a loyal servent
Cheeky Missy said:
Hnnn. So, the title being so, is the speaker a loyal servant to sin? It's a nasty poem. Rather fascinating and intriguing, but downright nasty,....and miserable too, it seems. Rather well-written, nonetheless. And for that, I enjoyed it a bit.
January 27th, 2011 00:28
Cheeky Missy said:
Hnnn. So, the title being so, is the speaker a loyal servant to sin? It's a nasty poem. Rather fascinating and intriguing, but downright nasty,....and miserable too, it seems. Rather well-written, nonetheless. And for that, I enjoyed it a bit.
January 27th, 2011 00:28
The Hollow
Cheeky Missy said:
Fascinating....intriguing. The hollow...isn't it so like the phenomenon called "black holes"? Isn't it, by your depiction, never satisfied? Forever voraciously devouring? Destroying,.....and there is no resisting? What is it? This is good for giving shivers!
January 20th, 2011 15:47
Cheeky Missy said:
Fascinating....intriguing. The hollow...isn't it so like the phenomenon called "black holes"? Isn't it, by your depiction, never satisfied? Forever voraciously devouring? Destroying,.....and there is no resisting? What is it? This is good for giving shivers!
January 20th, 2011 15:47
It mite help me
Cheeky Missy said:
Fascinating.....very. The tormented soul crying in vain for deliverance and mocking the helpless helpers because none can deliver....except the Lord.
January 18th, 2011 14:53
Cheeky Missy said:
Fascinating.....very. The tormented soul crying in vain for deliverance and mocking the helpless helpers because none can deliver....except the Lord.
January 18th, 2011 14:53
Endless Rose
StormyDay said:
Don't worry about if it make sense or not. If it makes sense to the writer, that's all that matters. And if it doesn't, well, call it your style. The great thing about poetry is 'poetic liscence'. Which is basically a smart way of saying we can mess up the grammar, spelling, ect.; do whatever we want and call it poetry.
January 13th, 2011 13:48
StormyDay said:
Don't worry about if it make sense or not. If it makes sense to the writer, that's all that matters. And if it doesn't, well, call it your style. The great thing about poetry is 'poetic liscence'. Which is basically a smart way of saying we can mess up the grammar, spelling, ect.; do whatever we want and call it poetry.
January 13th, 2011 13:48
twelve
Cheeky Missy said:
Wow.....as usual, it is very serious and rather deep....disturbing. It is like an inescapable acknowledgment of being trapped within oneself....being destroyed. Call me stupid/ignorant, but what do the numerical amounts signify? I'm only vaguely acquainted with the "99 Bottles of Beer On the Wall" song.....is it related to that concept?
January 13th, 2011 13:44
Cheeky Missy said:
Wow.....as usual, it is very serious and rather deep....disturbing. It is like an inescapable acknowledgment of being trapped within oneself....being destroyed. Call me stupid/ignorant, but what do the numerical amounts signify? I'm only vaguely acquainted with the "99 Bottles of Beer On the Wall" song.....is it related to that concept?
January 13th, 2011 13:44
Forever
Cheeky Missy said:
It is a sad picture you've poetically painted, and by your portrayal hinted at truth....for we are all dead unless the Lord saves us, so the graveyard is only too fitting. Is the rain truth?
December 15th, 2010 15:26
Cheeky Missy said:
It is a sad picture you've poetically painted, and by your portrayal hinted at truth....for we are all dead unless the Lord saves us, so the graveyard is only too fitting. Is the rain truth?
December 15th, 2010 15:26
The Figure
Cheeky Missy said:
How horrifying! This is nightmarish! What does it signify?
December 3rd, 2010 17:08
Cheeky Missy said:
How horrifying! This is nightmarish! What does it signify?
December 3rd, 2010 17:08
Nights Ending
Cheeky Missy said:
Wow. It is so bittersweet....I love the speaker's love....and you captured the moment so well that you can feel the pain in the conclusion.
December 2nd, 2010 15:57
Cheeky Missy said:
Wow. It is so bittersweet....I love the speaker's love....and you captured the moment so well that you can feel the pain in the conclusion.
December 2nd, 2010 15:57
Help me understand
Cheeky Missy said:
Short is an excellent way to make a point if you can be thus succinct.
And we do destroy ourselves in living wickedly.....but not always. The Word of God says the wicked prosper....but there IS the judgement at the end.
November 24th, 2010 21:26
Cheeky Missy said:
Short is an excellent way to make a point if you can be thus succinct.
And we do destroy ourselves in living wickedly.....but not always. The Word of God says the wicked prosper....but there IS the judgement at the end.
November 24th, 2010 21:26
Endless Rose
Cheeky Missy said:
Wow. I like this one. You painted something elusive and yet so real. I can almost identify and yet I cannot. Excellent! Oh,.....and what is it really about?
November 23rd, 2010 14:35
Cheeky Missy said:
Wow. I like this one. You painted something elusive and yet so real. I can almost identify and yet I cannot. Excellent! Oh,.....and what is it really about?
November 23rd, 2010 14:35
march of death
Cheeky Missy said:
La. What a piece.....you painted quite the scene. Reminds me a bit of the Red Badge of Courage, but I am sure that is a bad comparison. As for being dead, that is what we are all born, until/unless the Lord saves us and is our Life.
November 22nd, 2010 15:32
Cheeky Missy said:
La. What a piece.....you painted quite the scene. Reminds me a bit of the Red Badge of Courage, but I am sure that is a bad comparison. As for being dead, that is what we are all born, until/unless the Lord saves us and is our Life.
November 22nd, 2010 15:32
« Return to the profile of Jalso
