Comments received on poems by Louis Gibbs
THE LIGHT YOU PROVIDED
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
Thanks LOUIS ~ Many people cross our paths ~ some set examples and some show us the way. But in my experience ~ We (Men especially) tend to plough our own furrow and often end up in the DITCH ~ sometimes with the Tractor on top of us ! Yours BRIAN
July 12th, 2017 09:44
BRIAN & ANGELA said:
Thanks LOUIS ~ Many people cross our paths ~ some set examples and some show us the way. But in my experience ~ We (Men especially) tend to plough our own furrow and often end up in the DITCH ~ sometimes with the Tractor on top of us ! Yours BRIAN
July 12th, 2017 09:44
THE ENDLESS QUEST
Augustus said:
1. Fall on his sword. Not recommended
2. Die in battle being mocked by dull men of brawn.
3. Mentor
4. Move to another realm.
Enjoyed.
July 10th, 2017 19:31
Augustus said:
1. Fall on his sword. Not recommended
2. Die in battle being mocked by dull men of brawn.
3. Mentor
4. Move to another realm.
Enjoyed.
July 10th, 2017 19:31
THE ENDLESS QUEST
Nicholas Browning said:
Peace is something no price can outweigh. Nice job.
July 10th, 2017 19:06
Nicholas Browning said:
Peace is something no price can outweigh. Nice job.
July 10th, 2017 19:06
THE ENDLESS QUEST
Michael Edwards said:
I raised my visor so I could read this - visor down again to ensure anonymity - might take another sneak look again later when Orchidee is not around.
July 10th, 2017 14:19
Michael Edwards said:
I raised my visor so I could read this - visor down again to ensure anonymity - might take another sneak look again later when Orchidee is not around.
July 10th, 2017 14:19
THE ENDLESS QUEST
Fay Slimm. said:
Knights have an endless mission and cannot forsake the challenge ahead- - great read Louis my friend.
July 10th, 2017 13:04
Fay Slimm. said:
Knights have an endless mission and cannot forsake the challenge ahead- - great read Louis my friend.
July 10th, 2017 13:04
THE ENDLESS QUEST
burning-embers said:
For a knight to die on the job???? You must be jousting my friend!
July 10th, 2017 12:50
burning-embers said:
For a knight to die on the job???? You must be jousting my friend!
July 10th, 2017 12:50
THE ENDLESS QUEST
FredPeyer said:
This is an excellent, very thought provoking poem Louis. Indeed, when do we give up riding at windmills? A question that does not occur to any under 60! So far I haven\'t given up, but I choose my battles wisely :-)
July 10th, 2017 12:30
FredPeyer said:
This is an excellent, very thought provoking poem Louis. Indeed, when do we give up riding at windmills? A question that does not occur to any under 60! So far I haven\'t given up, but I choose my battles wisely :-)
July 10th, 2017 12:30
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
Gary Edward Geraci said:
Spot on! Bravo! For me, your last two lines \"We shall see...we shall see.\" prophetically ring more of hope than doubt, more of retributive justice than black, desolate nihilism. Your source is a well formed conscience my friend.
July 8th, 2017 11:50
Gary Edward Geraci said:
Spot on! Bravo! For me, your last two lines \"We shall see...we shall see.\" prophetically ring more of hope than doubt, more of retributive justice than black, desolate nihilism. Your source is a well formed conscience my friend.
July 8th, 2017 11:50
OF NO CONSEQUENCE
Augustus said:
You bring up a very interesting point. In the final analysis are we better off from the minds of the world\'s geniuses thought out history or are we the same as the consequence of the homeless bum on the corner? Great write!
July 7th, 2017 18:25
Augustus said:
You bring up a very interesting point. In the final analysis are we better off from the minds of the world\'s geniuses thought out history or are we the same as the consequence of the homeless bum on the corner? Great write!
July 7th, 2017 18:25
OF NO CONSEQUENCE
FredPeyer said:
Thanks for this thought provoking well written poem!
I happen to believe that NO life is inconsequential. Some touch maybe only a small circle around that life, while others influence many more. Like a stone thrown into a pond. The ripples keep on flowing outward and one does not know how far away they will touch something or someone. Remember the story about how the beat of a butterfly wing can change history? Any one of your beautiful, well written, and thoughtful poems could conceivable influence somebody way down the line of time. Who knows? Life is what it is, but it is made up of all of our thoughts and actions. Sorry, I kind of rambled on here. Was just supposed to be a comment on how good you are!
July 7th, 2017 12:24
FredPeyer said:
Thanks for this thought provoking well written poem!
I happen to believe that NO life is inconsequential. Some touch maybe only a small circle around that life, while others influence many more. Like a stone thrown into a pond. The ripples keep on flowing outward and one does not know how far away they will touch something or someone. Remember the story about how the beat of a butterfly wing can change history? Any one of your beautiful, well written, and thoughtful poems could conceivable influence somebody way down the line of time. Who knows? Life is what it is, but it is made up of all of our thoughts and actions. Sorry, I kind of rambled on here. Was just supposed to be a comment on how good you are!
July 7th, 2017 12:24
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
Goldfinch60 said:
Very true Louis, our emotions can be pulled apart with both joy and sadness.
July 6th, 2017 01:04
Goldfinch60 said:
Very true Louis, our emotions can be pulled apart with both joy and sadness.
July 6th, 2017 01:04
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
Louis Gibbs said:
I\'m surprised that no one has commented on the atrocity described in the author\'s comment section of this poem. Maybe the comments aren\'t usually read.
This is a horrible practice which has left an open wound on my heart. It was presented to the General Assembly of the UN by a survivor, who is now a big-time model, campaigning to have the practice stopped. I just wanted to get the awareness out there.
July 5th, 2017 21:52
Louis Gibbs said:
I\'m surprised that no one has commented on the atrocity described in the author\'s comment section of this poem. Maybe the comments aren\'t usually read.
This is a horrible practice which has left an open wound on my heart. It was presented to the General Assembly of the UN by a survivor, who is now a big-time model, campaigning to have the practice stopped. I just wanted to get the awareness out there.
July 5th, 2017 21:52
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
Louis Gibbs said:
Oops, that does appear to be a hole, doesn\'t it. It could have been an extra-terrestrial tribe I suppose.
So sorry you were abused like that, Candlewitch! My childhood abuse was slanted more toward the psychological and psychic forms, mixed in with some good old fashion belt beatings ... well rounded abuse you could say.
Thank you so much for your very kind response to my poem.
July 5th, 2017 15:19
Louis Gibbs said:
Oops, that does appear to be a hole, doesn\'t it. It could have been an extra-terrestrial tribe I suppose.
So sorry you were abused like that, Candlewitch! My childhood abuse was slanted more toward the psychological and psychic forms, mixed in with some good old fashion belt beatings ... well rounded abuse you could say.
Thank you so much for your very kind response to my poem.
July 5th, 2017 15:19
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
Renzi said:
As alfred said .. We cry in happiness and we cry in pain. But make not fault in knowing as a human those tears are different feelings.
July 5th, 2017 14:18
Renzi said:
As alfred said .. We cry in happiness and we cry in pain. But make not fault in knowing as a human those tears are different feelings.
July 5th, 2017 14:18
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
Louis Gibbs said:
No need to apologize, b-e, but thank you just the same. Apologies are in order from me for allowing myself to be triggered that way. As you can no doubt tell, my feelings run deep on the subject of religions in general. I really appreciate your input!
July 5th, 2017 10:47
Louis Gibbs said:
No need to apologize, b-e, but thank you just the same. Apologies are in order from me for allowing myself to be triggered that way. As you can no doubt tell, my feelings run deep on the subject of religions in general. I really appreciate your input!
July 5th, 2017 10:47
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
FredPeyer said:
Well written Louis! And it is true that both positive and negative events can trigger tears. We cry in happiness and we cry in pain.
July 5th, 2017 10:28
FredPeyer said:
Well written Louis! And it is true that both positive and negative events can trigger tears. We cry in happiness and we cry in pain.
July 5th, 2017 10:28
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
Stephen.Sapaugh said:
I really like a lot of the things that you are doing in this poem. For instance your alliteration, rhyme scheme, meter, and repetition are really well developed. However, there is one stanza that sticks out like a sore thumb. ,\"How is it that pure joy and exhilaration
Bring forth the same flow of tears from the heart
As do empathic pain and despair?
Is it that one causes longing for my true home
By reminding me of what it is,
While the other causes longing for it
By confronting me with that which it is not?\"
The rest of your poem follows a simple scheme. The first two stanzas are 6 lines that show and don\'t tell followed by Flow freely down my cheeks. Then your third stanza just begins to ask questions ,and I would argue too many questions. You could try editing the third stanza and trying to tie your thoughts up by ending it with the same line as the first two.
For instance you could use a metaphor like a waterfall to ask your question instead of asking the question out right. And it would even flow with your last line flow freely down my cheeks.
Other than that you could also work on your last stanza, and use colors to describes the extremes, or other things in nature.
I hope this helps. You have a lot of potential, and I really enjoyed a lot of this poem. If I were to grade it I would give it a 7/10.
July 5th, 2017 09:55
Stephen.Sapaugh said:
I really like a lot of the things that you are doing in this poem. For instance your alliteration, rhyme scheme, meter, and repetition are really well developed. However, there is one stanza that sticks out like a sore thumb. ,\"How is it that pure joy and exhilaration
Bring forth the same flow of tears from the heart
As do empathic pain and despair?
Is it that one causes longing for my true home
By reminding me of what it is,
While the other causes longing for it
By confronting me with that which it is not?\"
The rest of your poem follows a simple scheme. The first two stanzas are 6 lines that show and don\'t tell followed by Flow freely down my cheeks. Then your third stanza just begins to ask questions ,and I would argue too many questions. You could try editing the third stanza and trying to tie your thoughts up by ending it with the same line as the first two.
For instance you could use a metaphor like a waterfall to ask your question instead of asking the question out right. And it would even flow with your last line flow freely down my cheeks.
Other than that you could also work on your last stanza, and use colors to describes the extremes, or other things in nature.
I hope this helps. You have a lot of potential, and I really enjoyed a lot of this poem. If I were to grade it I would give it a 7/10.
July 5th, 2017 09:55
THE AGONY AND THE ECSTACY
burning-embers said:
True these two extremes bring forth tears. The price of being human u ask. A spiritual question indeed. Seek the teachings of the oldest religions and you may find some answers. There were answers to my questions.
July 5th, 2017 09:11
burning-embers said:
True these two extremes bring forth tears. The price of being human u ask. A spiritual question indeed. Seek the teachings of the oldest religions and you may find some answers. There were answers to my questions.
July 5th, 2017 09:11
THIS TIME AROUND
Goldfinch60 said:
Good write, we all feel better if we do not do some things in our lives.
July 4th, 2017 01:00
Goldfinch60 said:
Good write, we all feel better if we do not do some things in our lives.
July 4th, 2017 01:00
THIS TIME AROUND
Fay Slimm. said:
A clever conclusion to keep in mind Louis - it is the acts not taken that count.
July 3rd, 2017 13:50
Fay Slimm. said:
A clever conclusion to keep in mind Louis - it is the acts not taken that count.
July 3rd, 2017 13:50
THIS TIME AROUND
FredPeyer said:
Love your poem. You are saying A LOT in these nine short lines. Every action has a re-action. Choosing not to act is also an action with a re-action, but a different one.
How many times did I regret having done or said something. No action would have been so much better!
July 3rd, 2017 12:50
FredPeyer said:
Love your poem. You are saying A LOT in these nine short lines. Every action has a re-action. Choosing not to act is also an action with a re-action, but a different one.
How many times did I regret having done or said something. No action would have been so much better!
July 3rd, 2017 12:50
THIS TIME AROUND
Michael Edwards said:
As my son often says \'Procrastination is a virtue\'
July 3rd, 2017 12:08
Michael Edwards said:
As my son often says \'Procrastination is a virtue\'
July 3rd, 2017 12:08
THIS TIME AROUND
burning-embers said:
This shows you have wisdom. Whats been in your past enables you to avoid pitfalls ahead. Or maybe just \'less is more\'.
As a musician i learned that when soloing, the gaps between the notes are just as important as those notes themselves. Plenty of opportunity to show off how many notes i can play.... or.. play something meaningful instead. Good work.
July 3rd, 2017 10:58
burning-embers said:
This shows you have wisdom. Whats been in your past enables you to avoid pitfalls ahead. Or maybe just \'less is more\'.
As a musician i learned that when soloing, the gaps between the notes are just as important as those notes themselves. Plenty of opportunity to show off how many notes i can play.... or.. play something meaningful instead. Good work.
July 3rd, 2017 10:58
YOU LEFT A VOID
Fay Slimm. said:
Agree wholeheartedly on the sharing of soul through the connection of poetry -this can bring attachment at sometimes a very deep level. Kathy I am sure will be sorely missed during her break from the site. First rate versing dear Louis.
June 30th, 2017 12:26
Fay Slimm. said:
Agree wholeheartedly on the sharing of soul through the connection of poetry -this can bring attachment at sometimes a very deep level. Kathy I am sure will be sorely missed during her break from the site. First rate versing dear Louis.
June 30th, 2017 12:26
YOU LEFT A VOID
Michael Edwards said:
Great write but is Kathy going somewhere? She has only just kindly commented today on my latest posting.
June 30th, 2017 08:48
Michael Edwards said:
Great write but is Kathy going somewhere? She has only just kindly commented today on my latest posting.
June 30th, 2017 08:48
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