Just Another Way Out
[email protected] said:

This is an encouraging start. However, there\'s a lot of extraneous wording that if gotten rid of will make the poem much stronger. For example: \"Like some old church MIGHT sound PERHAPS.....I think removing perhaps would make the stanza resound more. The opening line is really good---in draws you in, especially \"such a pretty fabrication\".

January 25th, 2023 11:39

Just Another Way Out
Zain Khalid said:

Great!

I love this...
It\'s good to be a part of this amazing community.

January 24th, 2023 19:23

Just Another Way Out
Bella Shepard said:

Wonderfully worded my friend. Sad for the people who never seem to be able to find their true selves, and perhaps need help all the more. They do unwittingly compound their own misery, and you can only ask why?

January 24th, 2023 14:04

Just Another Way Out
Doggerel Dave said:

There are some shonkey architects about......Neville.....🙂

January 24th, 2023 08:15

A Single Truth For all Things Being Unequal
L. B. Mek said:

(distinction is vital
to enable recognition
yet
when bombarded with such endless
diversity
in all-things, existence
seldom are we offered the opportunity
to take note, of those tendril notes
that do more than tease our noses
and entice our eyes
within such a brief, gust of wind as life...)
I recognise the yearning for acceptance
of our fallible state, within ambition to experience
all of existence, greedily
in these subtle poem Hyung
\'just maybe, waiting
to be found and felt ..\'
a toast, dear Poet
for all the maybe\'s we\'ve yet
to feel
to taste, to treasure
as our next, next
favourite
\'Salut!\'
🍻😎
onwards then my friend, ever
onwards

January 23rd, 2023 04:22

The Day Before the Day Before Today
L. B. Mek said:

\'I watched you drown
in monochrome reflections\'
love this wording Hyung..
how we obsess the minutia
details
while watching our opportunity\'s
dissipate, before our very eyes...
(oh youth, oh weary soul
woe to ye, who dares attempt
to feign, sincerity
damned, to be a blind witness
to all that ye see
and relinquish, needlessly)

January 23rd, 2023 04:07

She Smelt Like 24 Carat Gold
Doggerel Dave said:

Precious few words there, Nev................................(departing or departed......?) 🙂

January 22nd, 2023 16:25

A Single Truth For all Things Being Unequal
orchidee said:

Good write N.
Every little thing - every big thing - that KP spends my money on. Mainly botox. Doh! She\'s a one.

January 22nd, 2023 07:10

A Single Truth For all Things Being Unequal
Fay Slimm. said:

Yes wholly agree mon ami that exciting adventures of finding both seen and future seen senses are waiting to be savoured by those who look, listen or sniff. An inspiring truth indeed................x

January 22nd, 2023 05:02

She Smelt Like 24 Carat Gold
Goldfinch60 said:

Sensual words Neville.

Andy

January 22nd, 2023 03:08

She Smelt Like 24 Carat Gold
Christina8 said:

This is a really sensual, great piece! In those moments she must have been like a treasure, like gold! x

January 21st, 2023 09:14

She Smelt Like 24 Carat Gold
Fay Slimm. said:

Strangely I can relate to the smell of reputedly odourless minerals though never had chance to sniff gold at so high a carat ! - -- your intimate lines can create memories dear Sire with the comparison your romantic words made - -- moer please- ........... x

January 21st, 2023 05:07

The Day Before the Day Before Today
Bella Shepard said:

The mystery of time permeates your poem, and the last four lines are priceless. For some reason, memories for me are like a classic movie in black and white, preserved in time, where I may start the projector and enjoy them over and over again. This verse so lovely!

January 20th, 2023 17:08

The Day Before the Day Before Today
orchidee said:

Good write N, but what day is that - Christmas?! lol.
With this, I feel like I\'m going shopping and meeting myself coming back, while on the way there! lol. I\'m a confused laddie - today, tomorrow, etc.

January 20th, 2023 14:32

A Handful of Random Thoughts and a Sunflower
Kinsey Peterson said:

Neville- once again a beautiful work of art. Distraction, while beautiful, is only that, a distraction. At what point do we face the music? To what song do we dance?

January 20th, 2023 09:55