Comments received on poems by Neville
Flawed #2
L. B. Mek said:
(My head says we should lock eyes
work it out, find a path
But this labouring heart, and stifled
breath
Recognise, we won\'t survive
A heart to heart, devoid of restraint
So I look, everywhere
But at those eyes, knowing
my kindness will be reciprocated
for old time\'s sake, for what remains
of what once, was
so sincere and pure...)
Brilliant!!!
January 30th, 2023 04:03
L. B. Mek said:
(My head says we should lock eyes
work it out, find a path
But this labouring heart, and stifled
breath
Recognise, we won\'t survive
A heart to heart, devoid of restraint
So I look, everywhere
But at those eyes, knowing
my kindness will be reciprocated
for old time\'s sake, for what remains
of what once, was
so sincere and pure...)
Brilliant!!!
January 30th, 2023 04:03
Making Out On a Loop
Christina8 said:
Love this! Living in the moment with passion and desire....Bravo!!
January 29th, 2023 18:53
Christina8 said:
Love this! Living in the moment with passion and desire....Bravo!!
January 29th, 2023 18:53
Making Out On a Loop
Fay Slimm. said:
Oh what an incorrigible romantic you are mon ami - who would not want to make out again on the premise of more heavenly repeats with that whispered ode in their ear ? ..........x
January 29th, 2023 16:42
Fay Slimm. said:
Oh what an incorrigible romantic you are mon ami - who would not want to make out again on the premise of more heavenly repeats with that whispered ode in their ear ? ..........x
January 29th, 2023 16:42
Making Out On a Loop
Bella Shepard said:
You\'ve written brilliantly of the desire to capture the moment, the experience, irrevocably in time. Beautiful, alluring, well done dear poet!
January 29th, 2023 15:47
Bella Shepard said:
You\'ve written brilliantly of the desire to capture the moment, the experience, irrevocably in time. Beautiful, alluring, well done dear poet!
January 29th, 2023 15:47
Flawed #2
Doggerel Dave said:
Or, as they once said in the very old days (and I was there though much more recent than Andy and orchi\'s claimed experience - but long enough): \' No washing your dirty linen in public\' š
January 29th, 2023 06:37
Doggerel Dave said:
Or, as they once said in the very old days (and I was there though much more recent than Andy and orchi\'s claimed experience - but long enough): \' No washing your dirty linen in public\' š
January 29th, 2023 06:37
Flawed #2
jarcher54 said:
If you\'ve made it this far with just 2 flaws, my dented hat off to you sir. I missed Flawed #1... using my imagination though...
January 28th, 2023 20:11
jarcher54 said:
If you\'ve made it this far with just 2 flaws, my dented hat off to you sir. I missed Flawed #1... using my imagination though...
January 28th, 2023 20:11
Flawed #2
Bella Shepard said:
How often do we feel a sense of disappointment when we come to find that all that glitters isn\'t gold, a sentiment you have captured all too well. Good write my friend!
January 28th, 2023 12:35
Bella Shepard said:
How often do we feel a sense of disappointment when we come to find that all that glitters isn\'t gold, a sentiment you have captured all too well. Good write my friend!
January 28th, 2023 12:35
Flawed #2
arqios said:
And we move on together or apart, hopeful in the revelation and the possibilities that have presented themselves!
January 28th, 2023 10:12
arqios said:
And we move on together or apart, hopeful in the revelation and the possibilities that have presented themselves!
January 28th, 2023 10:12
Flawed #2
Christina8 said:
I love this poem, Neville! That last stanza gives much to think about....as we are imperfect even though we wish perfection to be true...wonderful!
January 28th, 2023 09:48
Christina8 said:
I love this poem, Neville! That last stanza gives much to think about....as we are imperfect even though we wish perfection to be true...wonderful!
January 28th, 2023 09:48
Flawed #2
Lauraš» said:
Neville,
The grass isnāt always āgreener on the other sideā...is it!?
Much to ponder upon during this fine day.
Lauraš»
January 28th, 2023 08:11
Lauraš» said:
Neville,
The grass isnāt always āgreener on the other sideā...is it!?
Much to ponder upon during this fine day.
Lauraš»
January 28th, 2023 08:11
Flawed #2
Fay Slimm. said:
Obvious appears only to those who want to see - - some food for thought in this little gem my dear Sir N.........x
January 28th, 2023 04:43
Fay Slimm. said:
Obvious appears only to those who want to see - - some food for thought in this little gem my dear Sir N.........x
January 28th, 2023 04:43
The ConfessionĀ
L. B. Mek said:
attempting to scribe
those raw, heinous aspects
of our so-called \'human\' nature
rarely lends itself to poetic eloquence
be Proud, Hyung
you find it hard to write, despite
your unquestioned skill and talent
because, I feel
like me, you have an innate hatred
for the very fact
that such words, need to exist
but this is why, I refer to those I respect
\'we truth scribblers, few\'
this is why, we challenge ourselves
to word, a transparency
to our reality, even its most
detestable aspects..
(I read and learn, wise Poet
thank you!)
January 27th, 2023 03:28
L. B. Mek said:
attempting to scribe
those raw, heinous aspects
of our so-called \'human\' nature
rarely lends itself to poetic eloquence
be Proud, Hyung
you find it hard to write, despite
your unquestioned skill and talent
because, I feel
like me, you have an innate hatred
for the very fact
that such words, need to exist
but this is why, I refer to those I respect
\'we truth scribblers, few\'
this is why, we challenge ourselves
to word, a transparency
to our reality, even its most
detestable aspects..
(I read and learn, wise Poet
thank you!)
January 27th, 2023 03:28
Just Another Way Out
L. B. Mek said:
harrowingly Brilliant!
so insightful Hyung
sadly I recognise many a friend
who\'ve fallen for this
far, too common trapping
of ambition, to fit in
amongst circles, made more
of venomous tongues
than a forest of snakes..
(to me, this is less a poetic depiction
more, a sobering meditation
on the ill-fate, awaiting so many
who in their ambition, to fit in
do instead, push themselves
till their very foundation, of self
begins to creak and shudder
underneath, all that self-deceiving
and those, vultures
waiting to find the cracks, to exploit
any weakness
begin to throw, their insidious stones
wrapped in barded words, targeted
to do the most irreversible damage
...
here be the price, of acceptance
within our so called society
...
and yet, the alternative, is to be left
a bystander, to life itself
...
fck!)
January 27th, 2023 03:16
L. B. Mek said:
harrowingly Brilliant!
so insightful Hyung
sadly I recognise many a friend
who\'ve fallen for this
far, too common trapping
of ambition, to fit in
amongst circles, made more
of venomous tongues
than a forest of snakes..
(to me, this is less a poetic depiction
more, a sobering meditation
on the ill-fate, awaiting so many
who in their ambition, to fit in
do instead, push themselves
till their very foundation, of self
begins to creak and shudder
underneath, all that self-deceiving
and those, vultures
waiting to find the cracks, to exploit
any weakness
begin to throw, their insidious stones
wrapped in barded words, targeted
to do the most irreversible damage
...
here be the price, of acceptance
within our so called society
...
and yet, the alternative, is to be left
a bystander, to life itself
...
fck!)
January 27th, 2023 03:16
The ConfessionĀ
Doggerel Dave said:
If it\'s not too much trouble, Nev, would you mind if I put any appreciation on hold, until you arrive at a final version?
My overly literal mind has tied itself into a couple of knots over this, and I must take a lengthy lie down.
January 26th, 2023 18:43
Doggerel Dave said:
If it\'s not too much trouble, Nev, would you mind if I put any appreciation on hold, until you arrive at a final version?
My overly literal mind has tied itself into a couple of knots over this, and I must take a lengthy lie down.
January 26th, 2023 18:43
The ConfessionĀ
orchidee said:
KP says it\'s excellent. What does she know about poetry though?! lol.
January 26th, 2023 12:24
orchidee said:
KP says it\'s excellent. What does she know about poetry though?! lol.
January 26th, 2023 12:24
The ConfessionĀ
Caring dove said:
Interesting writing like how it starts more lighthearted with the mention of nature ( the sand ) and the turquoise umbrella ) but then it turns out he has a confession to make ( which I wasnāt expecting )
Especially like the first two verses
January 26th, 2023 11:31
Caring dove said:
Interesting writing like how it starts more lighthearted with the mention of nature ( the sand ) and the turquoise umbrella ) but then it turns out he has a confession to make ( which I wasnāt expecting )
Especially like the first two verses
January 26th, 2023 11:31
The ConfessionĀ
Fay Slimm. said:
Sensational write Nev. - The turquoise umbrella did it for me - - reminiscent of a wonderful painting by Andre Kohn and his girl had a torn skirt too - -however I know not a thing of the male who faced need of confession - - as always the clever intrigue calls for knowing a bit more re. this haunt of a read..........x
January 26th, 2023 09:08
Fay Slimm. said:
Sensational write Nev. - The turquoise umbrella did it for me - - reminiscent of a wonderful painting by Andre Kohn and his girl had a torn skirt too - -however I know not a thing of the male who faced need of confession - - as always the clever intrigue calls for knowing a bit more re. this haunt of a read..........x
January 26th, 2023 09:08
The ConfessionĀ
Christina8 said:
Wow an unexpected plot twist at the end. Very good!! x
January 26th, 2023 07:59
Christina8 said:
Wow an unexpected plot twist at the end. Very good!! x
January 26th, 2023 07:59
Just Another Way Out
[email protected] said:
This is an encouraging start. However, there\'s a lot of extraneous wording that if gotten rid of will make the poem much stronger. For example: \"Like some old church MIGHT sound PERHAPS.....I think removing perhaps would make the stanza resound more. The opening line is really good---in draws you in, especially \"such a pretty fabrication\".
January 25th, 2023 11:39
[email protected] said:
This is an encouraging start. However, there\'s a lot of extraneous wording that if gotten rid of will make the poem much stronger. For example: \"Like some old church MIGHT sound PERHAPS.....I think removing perhaps would make the stanza resound more. The opening line is really good---in draws you in, especially \"such a pretty fabrication\".
January 25th, 2023 11:39
Just Another Way Out
Goldfinch60 said:
Wonderful emotive words Neville.
Andy
January 25th, 2023 01:53
Goldfinch60 said:
Wonderful emotive words Neville.
Andy
January 25th, 2023 01:53
Just Another Way Out
Zain Khalid said:
Great!
I love this...
It\'s good to be a part of this amazing community.
January 24th, 2023 19:23
Zain Khalid said:
Great!
I love this...
It\'s good to be a part of this amazing community.
January 24th, 2023 19:23
Just Another Way Out
Bella Shepard said:
Wonderfully worded my friend. Sad for the people who never seem to be able to find their true selves, and perhaps need help all the more. They do unwittingly compound their own misery, and you can only ask why?
January 24th, 2023 14:04
Bella Shepard said:
Wonderfully worded my friend. Sad for the people who never seem to be able to find their true selves, and perhaps need help all the more. They do unwittingly compound their own misery, and you can only ask why?
January 24th, 2023 14:04
Just Another Way Out
Fay Slimm. said:
A summary of inner sadness never outed hence fabrication and changeable moods --- - -- tragic indeed when no life-purpose is found demise can seem the only way out - - your powerful words hit the stages of despair so clearly methinks mon ami...............x
January 24th, 2023 10:18
Fay Slimm. said:
A summary of inner sadness never outed hence fabrication and changeable moods --- - -- tragic indeed when no life-purpose is found demise can seem the only way out - - your powerful words hit the stages of despair so clearly methinks mon ami...............x
January 24th, 2023 10:18
Just Another Way Out
Doggerel Dave said:
There are some shonkey architects about......Neville.....š
January 24th, 2023 08:15
Doggerel Dave said:
There are some shonkey architects about......Neville.....š
January 24th, 2023 08:15
Just Another Way Out
Christina8 said:
Ooh I like this poem a lot. \"built like a temple\" is very sexy but the hollowness is sad......Also sad that she was the key player in her demise. Well done! x
January 24th, 2023 07:29
Christina8 said:
Ooh I like this poem a lot. \"built like a temple\" is very sexy but the hollowness is sad......Also sad that she was the key player in her demise. Well done! x
January 24th, 2023 07:29
A Single Truth For all Things Being Unequal
L. B. Mek said:
(distinction is vital
to enable recognition
yet
when bombarded with such endless
diversity
in all-things, existence
seldom are we offered the opportunity
to take note, of those tendril notes
that do more than tease our noses
and entice our eyes
within such a brief, gust of wind as life...)
I recognise the yearning for acceptance
of our fallible state, within ambition to experience
all of existence, greedily
in these subtle poem Hyung
\'just maybe, waiting
to be found and felt ..\'
a toast, dear Poet
for all the maybe\'s we\'ve yet
to feel
to taste, to treasure
as our next, next
favourite
\'Salut!\'
š»š
onwards then my friend, ever
onwards
January 23rd, 2023 04:22
L. B. Mek said:
(distinction is vital
to enable recognition
yet
when bombarded with such endless
diversity
in all-things, existence
seldom are we offered the opportunity
to take note, of those tendril notes
that do more than tease our noses
and entice our eyes
within such a brief, gust of wind as life...)
I recognise the yearning for acceptance
of our fallible state, within ambition to experience
all of existence, greedily
in these subtle poem Hyung
\'just maybe, waiting
to be found and felt ..\'
a toast, dear Poet
for all the maybe\'s we\'ve yet
to feel
to taste, to treasure
as our next, next
favourite
\'Salut!\'
š»š
onwards then my friend, ever
onwards
January 23rd, 2023 04:22
She Smelt Like 24 Carat Gold
L. B. Mek said:
funny how we smelt, true worth
of those we\'ve lost, after
but while in our hands, seemingly
like gold, they shine so dimly...
(clever and so true wise Poet
a wonderful nugget, to ponder)
sorry for your loss
January 23rd, 2023 04:11
L. B. Mek said:
funny how we smelt, true worth
of those we\'ve lost, after
but while in our hands, seemingly
like gold, they shine so dimly...
(clever and so true wise Poet
a wonderful nugget, to ponder)
sorry for your loss
January 23rd, 2023 04:11
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